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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/29790666">Then there was you</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Imao/pseuds/Imao'>Imao</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>The 100 (TV)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Awkward Flirting, Badass Lexa, Bisexual Female Character, College Student Lexa (The 100), Eventual Smut, Ex-Military Lexa, F/F, Fluff, Happy Ending, Lesbian Character, Light Angst, Med Student Clarke Griffin, Mutual Pining, Permanent Injury, Romance, Trauma</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-03-02</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-05-07</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-16 03:26:40</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>7</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>20,840</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/29790666</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Imao/pseuds/Imao</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>26 year-old Clarke is a medical resident and a party animal, but deep down she wants something more.<br/>27 year-old Lexa is a retired sergeant and a law student, who has suffered a permanent leg injury and (fortunately temporary) heartbreak.</p><p>Both of them have to learn to trust again.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Clarke Griffin &amp; Lexa, Clarke Griffin/Lexa</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>83</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>376</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <hr/>
<p>‘<em>For fuck’s sake Clarke, hurry up! I haven’t showered yet!</em>’</p>
<p>Raven was banging against the bathroom door, seemingly annoyed that Clarke was taking so much time in there. The sounds came out muffled and were barely audible under the stream of water. Clarke turned it off, wringing her hair before stepping out of the shower.</p>
<p>‘<em>I’m almost done! And it’s your fault, you waited until I came home to get ready!</em>’ Clarke shouted back, and she could hear Raven mumbling something in response but could not make out what it was.</p>
<p>They were supposed to be meeting some of Raven’s friends and Octavia’s boyfriend in less than forty minutes and it was a fifteen-minute subway ride to the bar they had agreed to go to. Clarke huffed as she retrieved her toiletries bag and walked out of the bathroom clad in only a towel, resigning to do her make up in her room instead.</p>
<p>Octavia’s head appeared at her door as she was applying her eyeliner.</p>
<p>‘<em>How’s my outfit?</em>’ She asked.</p>
<p>Clarke’s hand froze in mid-air and she took in the brunette’s appearance. She was wearing black leather jeans and a lace burgundy tank top that showed off her toned midriff and her latest tattoo. Add to that black platform shoes and a killer smoky eye, and Clarke was nodding appreciatively.</p>
<p>‘<em>Hot.</em>’ She noted. ‘<em>Lincoln will love it.</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>Thank you, and that’s the plan.</em>’ She winked before leaving Clarke to her occupations.</p>
<p>Thirty minutes later, the three of them were in the subway on their way to Arkadia, their favorite place to meet for drinks on Saturday nights like these. Clarke had chosen to wear her favorite baby blue dress, the one that hugged her generous curves in all the right places and brought out her eyes. She wasn’t always on good terms with her body, but the blonde knew that her eyes were her best feature so she took advantage of it.</p>
<p>‘<em>So, Monty is already there with his girlfriend Harper. I think you’ve met her already.</em>’ Raven said, checking the messages on her phone as the voice in the loudspeakers announced that the next station would be their stop. ‘<em>They’re both from my engineering classes. And Ontari said she’ll catch us later at the club. Did you hear from Lincoln, O?</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>Yeah, he shouldn’t be long.</em>’</p>
<p>Octavia and Lincoln had only been together for a couple of months. Clarke had been happy to meet him; he was a really nice guy, funny and sweet despite his bulky and intimidating stature. From what she knew, he was studying law, which had surprised her at first since he didn’t look like the kind of guy who would want to spend a long time in school.</p>
<p>They got off the subway at the next station and walked to the bar. The night air was crisp, with a slight breeze and even though she knew the crowd and the drinks would warm her up, Clarke was glad that Raven’s friends had managed to secure a table inside for them.</p>
<p>‘<em>Hey, Reyes!</em>’ Monty called from the other side of the bar, waving at them as they walked in.</p>
<p>Raven waved back enthusiastically and the three of them made their way over to Monty and Harper who had already ordered their drinks. Clarke liked Monty. He was usually shy with new people but when prompted, he could actually ramble for hours about fluid mechanics and other obscure subjects that Clarke did not really understand. He was a bit of a nerd, but again, most of the people in Raven’s branch were. Harper was a perfect match for him. Clarke didn’t know her well yet but she could see that they completed each other. She was more out-going and seemed like the kind of girl who liked to party.</p>
<p>Raven got the first round of drinks for them and then Clarke bought the next round. Two hours and a few margaritas later, the blonde was starting to feel hot and slightly dizzy, in a good way. Lincoln had joined them and quickly caught up, and him and Octavia were being more touchy-feely than usual. Raven was talking very loudly and laughing at her own jokes.</p>
<p>‘<em>Hey, it’s past midnight,</em>’ Clarke slurred, grinning lazily at her friend’s antics. ‘<em>Let’s get going?</em>’</p>
<p>She bought a last round of shots to get them through to the nightclub, knowing that the booze there would be a lot more expensive, and they all took off in a swarm of hearty laughs and playful banter.</p>
<p>***</p>
<p>‘<em>Ayyeee Griffin!</em>’ Raven yelled above the loud music, stumbling towards Clarke and nearly spilling her drink in the process. ‘<em>Preying upon handsome young men again?</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>Shut up!</em>’ Clarke replied with a laugh. ‘<em>He bought me a drink- I wasn’t going to turn him down!</em>’</p>
<p>She looked over at the man who was paying his tabs at the bar a few feet away. It didn’t help that he was really hot, too, with dark curly hair and strong arms. The hint of a muscular chest was peeking through the collar of his unbuttoned shirt. He looked just a little older than her, probably in his late twenties.</p>
<p>‘<em>Good on ya hot stuff. Be safe though!</em>’ Raven said, squeezing her shoulder and giving her a messy peck on the cheek before disappearing back into the crowd.</p>
<p>Clarke leaned against the bar, deep in thought –at least as much as she could given her level of drunkenness. Her ears were buzzing and she felt hot in the face. The sounds of the crowd were mixing with the music and the lights were dancing brightly in her field of vision. Michael Jackson’s ‘Rock With You’ was playing and Clarke took another sip of her gin.</p>
<p>‘<em>Hey baby.</em>’</p>
<p>The man was back. His name was Jake, or Mark- or maybe Nick, Clarke couldn’t remember but she was pretty sure it was a four-letter word. Normally, she would have cringed at the pet name, especially from someone whom she had just met, but she was too far gone to care. She indulged him when he pinned her against the bar and started dancing very close to her, grinding against her hips and breathing into her neck.</p>
<p>‘<em>Hey. Let’s get out of here alright?</em>’ Clarke slurred out before politely pushing him away. ‘<em>Your place?</em>’</p>
<p>She was suddenly feeling very horny. It was nothing that her fingers or vibrator couldn’t fix, only she had a really aesthetically pleasing human specimen in her company and she very much intended on getting laid tonight. She quickly texted Raven and Octavia that she was leaving before following Jake –or whatever his name was- out of the club and into an uber.</p>
<p>***</p>
<p>Clarke woke up the next morning with the feeling of a searing headache pulsing through her temples. She groaned as her eyes caught the blinding daylight of the early morning and it took her a few moments to realize that she was not in her own bed. The events of the previous night came crashing back onto her and she cursed under her breath, noticing two strong arms loosely wrapped around her very naked upper body.</p>
<p>She couldn’t even remember the name of the man that was in bed with her. Judging by what she felt against her back, he was just as naked as her. Clarke cringed at the feeling of the sweat accumulated and lingering between her bodies. She wriggled a bit, trying to free herself from the stranger’s hold on her torso without waking him up. <em>Okay</em> <em>Griffin- clothes, purse and then quick exit. You can do this.</em> Oddly enough, her inner voice sounded a lot like Raven.</p>
<p>It took a bit of contorting but she finally managed to get out of bed with all the agility and grace she could muster after a night of heavy drinking. When she stood up, the room was still spinning slightly and she had to fight back the urge to throw up right there and then. Her throat was parched and her tongue was furred from the amount of alcohol she had had. She quickly scanned the room in search of her underwear and found her discarded panties hanging at the doorknob. She put them back on, her face scrunched up in disgust.</p>
<p>She continued her treasure hunt as quietly as possible, retrieving her bra and her dress. She mentally thanked her drunken past self for having at least the presence of mind of setting her purse neatly on the nightstand. She quickly got dressed and wasted no time bolting out the door.</p>
<p>‘<em>Fuck what is the address?</em>’ She muttered to herself while looking for an uber.</p>
<p>She had been way too hammered to take note of her surroundings the previous night, so it took a quick google maps search before she was able to determine where she was. Thankfully, it would be a short ride to her place.</p>
<p>The driver pulled over on the side of the curb and Clarke thanked him before stepping outside of the car with a relieved sigh. She had been two minutes away from throwing up on his leather seats. She stumbled over to the front door of the building and made her way to the 3<sup>rd</sup> floor.</p>
<p>‘<em>Hey look who’s back!</em>’ Raven greeted from the couch when Clarke appeared at the door of their apartment. ‘<em>Griffin, you got laid?! We want all the juicy details!</em>’</p>
<p>Clarke groaned at the brunette’s enthusiasm and rubbed a palm to her throbbing temple. It was embarrassing enough doing this walk of shame when her roommates were home, she didn’t need to be reminded of her impromptu sexcapade with a complete stranger. She usually wasn’t the kind of person to just hook up with random people, but lately she had felt like she had a really horny alter-ego that took over when she drank too much and she had let it happen several weekends in a row over the past few weeks.</p>
<p>‘<em>Can you lower your voice please?’</em> Clarke whined as she made her way to the kitchen to pour herself a big glass of water.<em> ‘I swear I feel like my head is going to explode. And sorry to disappoint you but I have no recollection of anything that happened between 2am and 9am this morning.</em>’</p>
<p>Raven pouted and sagged back into the couch.</p>
<p>‘<em>Well you certainly look like shit so it doesn’t surprise me.</em>’ She joked.</p>
<p>‘<em>Aw thanks Reyes.</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>Oh are you back yet?</em>’ Octavia said as she walked out of her room, startling Clarke in the process. ‘<em>Let me guess: guy or gal this time?</em>’</p>
<p>The blonde huffed at her friend’s judgmental comment and decided not to answer. She headed to the bathroom, desperate for a long, steamy shower to wash the sin off of her. She did look like shit. She still had bed hair and her make up from the previous night was smeared under her eyes and around her lips. She stepped under the stream of warm water and scrubbed herself raw until she had rid herself of the sheen of sweat and the stickiness that covered her skin.</p>
<p>The previous weekend, she had ended up at some girl’s apartment after a night out with Raven. The weekend before that, it was with somebody else. It was quickly becoming a weekly habit of hers: first drink, then fuck the sexiest person she could find at the club, then wake up completely grossed out and hungover and spend her whole Sunday regretting it. At first, her friends had been encouraging. After all, she had been single ever since she had broken up with Finn and that was almost two years ago; she needed to move on and she wanted to.</p>
<p>Her relationship with Finn had been her longest and most meaningful one by far; they had met in high school and started dating in junior year but then Clarke had moved out of state to complete her bachelor’s degree in medical science while Finn had stayed at the local university to study politics. They stayed long-distance for almost five years, taking turns to make the trip one week end a month so they could see each other. Flying in and out of state for only a couple of days at a time was expensive but they had managed as much as they could with the small income from their respective part-time jobs.</p>
<p>Everything had been great between them, until it wasn’t. Finn had started cheating on her with a girl from his class and Clarke got word of it by a childhood friend about six months later. She had been heartbroken; Finn had been her first kiss, first love, first everything. After that she had shut him out of her life and decided to concentrate on getting through medical school. For a few months, she had been friends with benefits with this one girl, Niylah, whom she had met at one of her internships, until Niylah had found a girlfriend.</p>
<p>Now Clarke was hooking up regularly, something she had never really been into before. On the rare occasions they had occurred in the past, one night stands had never satisfied her. They were a meaningless, momentary physical release that she certainly needed, although she never remembered it the morning after. However, the aftermath of these encounters always made her uneasy and she was seriously getting tired of this roller-coaster of emotions that she experienced almost on a weekly basis now.</p>
<p>Clarke was definitely regretting last night’s shambles. She was hunched over the toilet, throwing up so much that she was starting to think maybe her soul had left her body alongside the puke.</p>
<p>‘<em>You okay?</em>’</p>
<p>Octavia came up behind her, kneeling by her side and keeping her freshly showered hair out of the way while she was emptying the contents of her stomach.</p>
<p>‘<em>Yeah, I’m a ray of sunshine right now.</em>’ Clarke rolled her eyes. ‘<em>Thank you though.</em>’</p>
<p>Once she was certain that she had nothing more to throw up, Clarke flushed the toilet and stood up to rinse her mouth, washing away the horrible taste. She gripped the edge of the sink and hung her head in defeat.</p>
<p>‘<em>Fuck, I feel like a pile of trash.</em>’ She mumbled, more to herself than anything.</p>
<p>‘<em>I don’t know about that but from the outside you sure look the part.</em>’ Octavia replied in all honesty, and Clarke could not bring herself to disagree.</p>
<p>‘<em>Please, do not let me drink ever again.</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>You say that every time we go out, Clarke. Are you sure it’s only the hangover that’s making you so miserable?</em>’</p>
<p>Clarke turned around slightly to look at her friend, startled a little by her remark. Octavia was earnest and there wasn’t a trace of mockery on her face.</p>
<p>‘<em>What do you mean?</em>’ She asked warily.</p>
<p>‘<em>I mean,</em>’ Octavia started with a long sigh. ‘<em>that you’ve been picking up these guys and girls at parties lately and don’t get me wrong, I’m all for an independent woman who knows what she wants and gets it, but it doesn’t seem to do you good.</em>’                                                                               </p>
<p>‘<em>I can take care of myself!</em>’ Clarke protested.</p>
<p>She was upset that Octavia would dare to lecture her on that. After all, the brunette had had her share of one night stands too and Clarke had never been anything but supportive, just making sure that she was safe and in good company, and only worrying sometimes when her friend came home a little later than usual.</p>
<p>‘<em>Really? Because it feels like I have to pick up the pieces every time because you regret having sex with strangers.</em>’</p>
<p>Clarke was genuinely offended now but the worst thing about it was that Octavia wasn’t wrong, and Clarke didn’t have anything to say for her defense. The brunette had probably noticed that because she softened immediately.</p>
<p>‘<em>I know, you’re Clarke Griffin, you’re a big girl, but I’m saying this to you as a friend. Every weekend you’re hungover and depressed and as much as I hate holding your hair while you puke, I think I hate seeing you depressed even more. I don’t know what you’re looking for but I don’t think one-night-stands are a solution.</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>So you’re saying I have issues?</em>’ Clarke snapped back, gritting her teeth.</p>
<p>‘<em>No</em>’, Octavia said calmly. ‘<em>I’m saying that you should ask yourself why you keep doing this if it does not satisfy you.</em>’</p>
<p>Clarke snorted, laughing dryly at Octavia’s one-dimensional way of seeing things. Like that would just solve all of her problems.</p>
<p>‘<em>That’s easy to say for you. You have Lincoln, he’s great, you love him, he loves you. What do I have?</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>Um, you have us. Raven and I, we’re here and we’re not going anywhere. Is that not enough for you?</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>You know what I mean, O. It’s not the same.</em>’ Clarke mumbled, looking at the red-rimmed eyes of her reflection in the mirror.</p>
<p>Octavia sighed understandingly and brushed a strand of Clarke’s hair out of her face. Octavia was not the person Clarke usually went to for cuddles and hugs, but she found herself drawn into her friend’s arms before she could register it. She didn’t know whether it was her or Octavia who had initiated it, but she welcomed it anyway, forgetting about her previous anger because deep down, she knew that her friend was right.</p>
<p>‘<em>I know. I understand.</em>’</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Chapter 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Lexa POV: a little insight on her situation, and a first encounter between Clarke and Lexa.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Chapter 2 is up :)<br/>Be mindful of TW for sexual harrassment and language (pretty mild to my standards but I'd rather give you a little heads up just in case). This story will probably be a not-so-slow burn and a little cheesy and cliché, courtesy to me not having the time to write long chapters and a complicated plot. As I have mentioned in reply to a comment, I am doing this mostly to entertain myself and others who might be interested in reading it, so there you go :) Enjoy!</p>
<p>Also not a native speaker and no beta reader so all mistakes are mine, feel free to point them out.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <hr/>
<p>It was already dark outside when Lexa made it back to her apartment. She had been working late at the library with her study group and was in desperate need of some food and rest. She felt a cold chill creep up her spine when she noticed that her door was unlocked, and she pushed inside with caution only to find Anya working at the stove, with her back to the door. The other woman turned around when Lexa walked in.</p>
<p>‘<em>Hey there!</em>’ Anya greeted, waving at her with a spatula in her hand.</p>
<p>Lexa relaxed immediately and brought a hand up to her heart, willing it to stop racing.</p>
<p>‘<em>Hey.</em>’ She deadpanned. ‘<em>I know I gave you a key to my place but a little heads up before you invite yourself over would be nice, I thought someone had broken in, it scared the shit out of me.</em>’</p>
<p>She huffed as she dropped her messenger bag to the floor before kicking off her shoes next to the doormat. The small apartment was filled with a wonderful scent that had Lexa’s stomach making noises.</p>
<p>‘<em>Sorry,</em>’ Anya replied, not looking sorry at all. ‘<em>I finished early and I just thought you’d like to have a nice dinner and a movie night? I know your Thursdays are hectic.</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>That’s very sweet, thank you.</em>’</p>
<p>Lexa went to hug her cousin behind the counter before plopping herself onto the couch with a groan. She left her crutch against the armrest and instinctively reached for the box of pills in her jeans pocket, popping two of them in her mouth before laying back.</p>
<p>‘<em>How was your day?</em>’ Anya asked as she stirred the food inside of the pan.</p>
<p>‘<em>Long. I had a full day of classes and then had to meet with our study group to work on next week’s presentation. It should be better tomorrow though. I’m not starting until eleven. How was yours?</em>’</p>
<p>Anya was the owner of Polis Café in the city, a small and cozy place where Lexa liked to go for some quiet. It was not too far from the university which was very convenient because she could easily stop by at the end of the day to say hello.</p>
<p>Anya proceeded to tell Lexa about the regular who always came in at 12:35 sharp every week day to order the same caramel macchiato with extra cream and ice on the side. His name was Gus, he was a construction worker and he always wore band t-shirts. Anya had told Lexa about him multiple times already, but since he came in almost every day, there was always a new story to tell.</p>
<p>‘<em>He asked me out on a date.</em>’ Anya said, practically squealing with delight, and Lexa almost choked on her own saliva.</p>
<p>‘<em>Wow.</em>’ She said. ‘<em>When? Where?</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>Next weekend. We’re going to see a movie.</em>’</p>
<p>She was grinning from ear to ear, so engrossed in her own happiness that she almost let the food burn on the stove. Lexa watched with a pang of envy; her thirty-year-old cousin looked like a kid who had just found her parents’ stash of Halloween candy.</p>
<p>‘<em>That’s really great, Anya. I’m really happy for you!</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>Yeah I know.</em>’ Anya said, suddenly composed as she brought two full plates of food over to the coffee table. ‘<em>But I mean, we’ll see how it goes. It’s no big deal.</em>’</p>
<p>Lexa scoffed. She knew her cousin all too well. Anya was mostly a laid-back, calm and unconcerned being; at least that’s what she tried to project when she was out into the world. But secretly, Lexa knew that she had no chill.</p>
<p>‘<em>Are you kidding me? You’ve been telling me about this guy for six months. It’s about fucking time! Just go to the date and have beautiful, passionate lovemaking afterwards. It’s going to be great.</em>’</p>
<p>Anya rolled her eyes and pretended to gag. She visibly tried to cover up the last glimmer of excitement on her face with an earnest expression.</p>
<p>‘<em>Speaking of which: how long has it been since you last had sex?</em>’ She asked, and Lexa was taken aback by the turnaround.</p>
<p>‘<em>Oh, now we’re talking about me?’</em> She shook her head in disbelief at Anya’s not so subtle attempt at directing the conversation elsewhere.</p>
<p>‘<em>I’m serious, Lex. When did you last--?</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>You know when.</em>’ Lexa cut her off, suddenly very uncomfortable with the subject.</p>
<p>Her last relationship –in every sense of the word- had been with her former girlfriend, Costia. They had been together for two years, until Lexa was in an accident at work that severely damaged her leg. Lexa had to have surgery to repair part of the damage and had to attend physiotherapy sessions for almost a year to be able to walk almost normally –with a crutch, at least. She inherited chronic pain and needed her painkillers on a daily basis, even still today. Right after the accident, Lexa went through a rough patch for several months –she had to quit her blossoming career in the military and find something else to do with her life. That, plus the rest of her condition had caused several changes in their lifestyle and their relationship suffered from it.</p>
<p>Costia stuck with her through a good part. She had managed as much as she could, driving Lexa around to her doctor’s appointments several times a week when she couldn’t drive, making sure she took her medication, helping her with the simplest tasks at home and being there for her when things were hard. But eventually it got to be too much and she left. That was two years ago. After that, Lexa moved out and decided to find a place closer to Anya. When things had gotten a bit better, she had decided to enroll in college and start studying law. Her military pension paid some of it, which she was grateful for.</p>
<p>Still, Costia walking off had left a searing pain in her gut. After two years, Lexa had eventually kissed the girl goodbye, but she still couldn’t help but feel like Costia had been right to leave. She was sort of high-maintenance. Not so much now that she was more autonomous and could do things herself, but she still had her bad days. Days when the pain was too much and she couldn’t really do anything about it, no matter how many pills she took. Days when her anxiety from the accident kicked back in with a vengeance. Lately, it had been a lot better though. She had been seeing Anya and some of her friends from class. She had even been going out a little, something she had never really been accustomed to. So yes, Lexa would be lying to herself if she said she hadn’t thought about finding someone again.</p>
<p>‘<em>That’s a long dry spell.</em>’ Anya noted after a quiet while, bringing Lexa out of her thoughts. ‘<em>I’m honestly amazed you’re not jumping everything that breathes.</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>First of all, it’s not like I can literally jump.</em>’ Lexa replied with a huff, although her tone was playful.<em> ‘And second of all, it sucks, and it kinda comes with the crutch, y’know?</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>What do you mean?</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>Who would want to be with a crippled 27 year-old? Look at me, I’m like a grandma.</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>Babe…</em>’ Anya started, reaching out for Lexa’s shoulder and squeezing it. ‘<em>Don’t call yourself that. There are a lot of things that define you, and that crutch is not one of them. You’re smart, funny, really hot and you have a great ass… that comes with being hot but I just thought I’d highlight it because your ass is really that good and—</em>‘</p>
<p>‘<em>Can you stop rambling about my ass?</em>’ Lexa rolled her eyes at her cousin. ‘<em>I’m starting to think you’re gayer than you think.</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>What the hell??! We’re related, that’s gross.</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>Whatever.</em>’</p>
<p>They ate in a silence punctuated by the clatter of knives and forks on the plates, and after a while, Anya spoke again.</p>
<p>‘<em>You know what?</em>’ She said, turning abruptly towards Lexa with her mouth full. ‘<em>I think you should put yourself out there. Go on tinder!</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>Seriously, Anya—</em>‘ Lexa rolled her eyes. ‘<em>I remember when you were on tinder. This app is full of horny creeps.</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>Come on, I’ll create your profile. Before you know it, girls will be lining up at your doorstep.</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>I’m not sure I—</em>‘</p>
<p>‘<em>Give it a try at least?</em>’</p>
<p>Lexa shrugged and tossed her phone to Anya who responded with a victorious smirk. She downloaded the app, chose a profile picture and wrote a bio, not showing Lexa until she was done.</p>
<p>‘<em>There you go.</em>’ Anya smirked, handing the phone back to Lexa after several long minutes.</p>
<p><em>’27 year-old bombshell… single and ready to mingle… loves cats… *wink wink*…</em>’ Lexa read. ‘<em>Anya, that’s terrible. How do you delete that??! That’s not me!</em>’</p>
<p>The profile picture was one of her in a bathing suit. It was a candid shot that one of her friends had taken at the beach the previous summer, but it showed off her toned stomach and the shadow of her cleavage. Anya just laughed at the notifications that started appearing on Lexa’s screen just seconds later, indicating that several people were interested. Lexa groaned.</p>
<p>‘<em>Fuck you.</em>’</p>
<p>Anya snickered, watching as Lexa tapped off the messages that popped up on her phone –a swarm of peach emojis and tongues, and a handful of bland introductions. Lexa silently made a vow to delete the app as soon as she could, and in the meantime she buried her phone under a pile of cushions. The two of them browsed Netflix for a while until they settled on watching a bad comedy movie, eventually falling asleep on the couch before the credits rolled.</p>
<p>***</p>
<p>It was almost a week later, and Lexa was riding the bus to attend an early morning class. She had woken up late, startled by her fourth alarm, and practically had to bolt out the door. She hadn’t had time to shower, which was usually how she liked to start her days, so she still felt a little sleepy and kind of gross on top of that. She let out a long yawn and clutched her messenger bag tighter when the bus stopped and a swarm of people got on.</p>
<p>She was nearly pressed against the sliding doors by the crowd and had to concentrate not to be thrown off-balance, putting all her weight on her crutch. She groaned internally when she realized that she was still a few stops away from her destination. She hated morning bus rides because they were always busy and she had to stand, and being jostled by the other passengers made it all the more difficult with her bad leg.</p>
<p>Lexa tore her eyes from her phone screen before motion-sickness could settle in and instead redirected her gaze to the crowd around her. She was immediately drawn to another woman who was leaning against the pole, or rather holding on for dear life as the sudden stops and go’s of the bus kept shoving her against the people around her.</p>
<p>She was blonde –a a beautiful, golden blonde, too, and Lexa was pretty sure it was natural because she couldn’t see any dark roots from where she was standing- and about the same height as her. She was dressed rather modestly, in yoga pants, a v-neck t-shirt and a jacket, and Lexa took it that this woman was not headed for work –unless she was a yoga instructor. She looked young, in her mid-twenties probably. A backpack was hoisted on her shoulder and the cable of the earphones she was wearing was connected to the front pocket. Sadly, the blonde was looking down and Lexa could not see her face because her beachy waves were obstructing the view like a curtain.</p>
<p>Lexa was so enthralled in her staring that she only just registered the two men that were standing behind her, very close. So close that one of them was almost breathing in her neck and the blonde herself was probably too immersed in her music to pay attention. Lexa thought for a second that they were friends with the woman, but then she saw the pleased look on the two men’s faces as they talked quietly, stealing glances towards the blonde as though they were planning something.</p>
<p>The woman in question seemed oblivious to it and so were the other people around. Lexa was hesitant to intervene: maybe she was overreacting? Maybe she was misinterpreting the situation? After all, maybe they really were friends and she would just make a fool of herself if she tried to give the blonde a heads up? But this went on for several minutes and Lexa was growing more certain as the men’s behavior was growing more suspicious. She was about to step up, crowded bus be damned, but then they reached another stop and the blonde finally moved to get off the bus, quickly followed by the two men.</p>
<p>Lexa had a bad feeling in her gut, having had a few unwanted encounters in public transports herself in the past –nothing too serious, just a couple of thirsty college frat boys who had been a little too insistent, but still enough that it was always an uncomfortable situation, especially if there was no one else around. She wasn’t supposed to get off the bus until another two stops. She took a quick look at her phone; she was already late anyway. Lexa made her way out to follow the blonde right before the doors slid shut.</p>
<p>‘<em>Hey lovely.</em>’</p>
<p>As she had predicted, the two men had already cornered the blonde against the PVC wall of the bus shelter. One of them put a hand on her shoulder, which startled the woman and prompted her to remove her earphones.</p>
<p>‘<em>Care to go for a drink sometime?</em>’ He asked. ‘<em>There’s two of us, just take your pick.</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>Or you know, you can get us both, too.</em>’ The other man added with a smirk which earned him a raucous laugh from his friend.</p>
<p>‘<em>Leave me alone, I’m not interested.</em>’ The blonde said before turning away from them.</p>
<p>She started walking but was stopped again by the tallest of the two.</p>
<p>‘<em>Come on, just one night! I know at least two things you could bring to the table—</em>‘</p>
<p>His gaze drifted down towards the blonde’s chest without any shame. He seemed to get a bit handsy too, and Lexa took it as her cue to step up.</p>
<p>‘<em>She said she wasn’t interested.</em>’ She spat, walking toward the little group. ‘<em>Leave her the fuck alone!</em>’</p>
<p>The two men turned around when she spoke.</p>
<p>‘<em>Ooh feisty.</em>’ The short one said, examining her from head to toes. ‘<em>I like it. Always the best ones in bed. What’s the cane for, baby?</em>’</p>
<p>He reached out to grab Lexa’s crutch but the brunette still had good reflexes from her military training. She stepped back and swung the metal stick hard into the back of the man’s legs. His knees gave out under the force of the hit and he fell to the ground with a pathetic yelp.</p>
<p>‘<em>What the fuck?!</em>’</p>
<p>His friend looked at her in shock, all thoughts of the blonde now forgotten as he helped his mate up without taking his eyes off of Lexa for fear she would strike again. The woman herself seemed surprised at Lexa’s reaction. Her eyes were wide and her jaw was hanging open. She had a beautiful face, even frozen in disbelief.</p>
<p>‘<em>Just wait you little b—</em>‘</p>
<p>The short man was back on his feet and his face was red –with rage? Embarrassment? Maybe a mix of both.</p>
<p>‘<em>Come on, Jay. Not worth it. Let’s go.</em>’</p>
<p>The other man pulled his friend by the arm and walked away, muttering something about Lexa being a fucking psycho. Lexa finally relaxed when they were far enough from them, and turned to the blonde woman who was still pressed against the wall and staring in awe.</p>
<p>‘<em>Wow.</em>’ She finally said. ‘<em>That was impressive. And quick.</em>’</p>
<p>Lexa couldn’t help but notice the woman had beautiful blue eyes, a vibrant shade that stood out against her pale complexion and that complimented her golden waves perfectly. Her voice was raspy and lower than average and Lexa instantly felt pulled towards the stranger who reminded her of summer, the ocean and the beach. She wouldn’t be surprised to find out that the woman smelled like salt and sunscreen too, although Lexa didn’t step closer to sniff her because she was a gay mess, but certainly not a creep. And also because she realized she had been staring for too long now and it was becoming obvious, as suggested by the increasing smile on the blonde’s lips.</p>
<p>‘<em>Um yeah. I’ve got a couple of other moves up my sleeve.</em>’ Lexa finally replied with a lopsided grin. ‘<em>Are you okay?</em>’</p>
<p>The blonde cleared her throat before answering and a lovely blush settled on her cheeks. If she didn’t know any better, Lexa would have thought she was staring too. She was suddenly regretting her lack of shower this morning more than ever.</p>
<p>‘<em>Yeah I’m fine. Thank you for intervening. I think these guys will definitely remember this.</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>I sure hope so.</em>’</p>
<p>They stood there, smiling awkwardly at each other and not really knowing how to continue this conversation, until Lexa remembered that she was supposed to be in class right now. She looked up at the screen displaying the bus hours. Next one would be in a minute.</p>
<p>‘<em>Hey I’m really sorry, I need to go. I’m already late for class.</em>’ She said, giving the woman an apologetic look.</p>
<p>‘<em>Oh, right.</em>’ The blonde said with a look that made Lexa almost reconsider leaving. ‘<em>Um, can I maybe, uh, treat you to coffee sometime? As a proper thank you?</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>I’d love that.</em>’ Lexa smiled.</p>
<p>They exchanged phones and Lexa entered her phone number, saving it under the name “Bus stop Lexa”. She retrieved hers from the blonde’s hand and stole a quick look at her contact info before speaking.</p>
<p>‘<em>I’ll see you around then… Clarke.</em>’</p>
<p>Clarke nodded, beaming, and Lexa hoisted her bag higher on her shoulder before turning away and getting on the bus. Lexa checked the time on her phone: it was 8:45, which would make her almost half an hour late to her Constitutional law class, but Pr. Kane’s contemptuous little jabs would be a small price to pay for a pretty girl’s phone number.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I hope you liked it :) I have more in store if you are interested in reading. Next chapter will be Clarke POV.<br/>Comments and kudos are very much appreciated! It's always a nice surprise to have feedback :) Cheers! x</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Chapter 3</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Clarke POV: Clarke and Lexa bond over coffee and Clarke is a big bisexual mess.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Thank you so much for the positive feedback on chapter 2! I hope this one lives up to your expectations :) I have 11 chapters planned already with a rough outline for each of them, but I might add a couple of them to finish the story properly. Anyway, here goes. x</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <hr/>
<p>                When Clarke woke up from her three-hour long nap the following evening, it was almost time for dinner. She had worked the graveyard shift all night until eight o’clock that morning and as usual, her sleep pattern was disturbed and she had been tired for most of the day. However, the brown-haired girl with the crutch had never left her mind. Clarke kept replaying the scene in her head: the young woman’s lean frame with a slight limp in her step didn’t look like the kind of person in the position to stand up to a bully, but she had nonetheless, and her technique had proven very successful.</p>
<p>Her wide, bright eyes had caught Clarke’s attention as much as her little trick. She hadn’t had the opportunity to catch the girl’s stare long enough to be able to determine their color, but they were beautiful and filled with a fire that could probably have burned those assholes to the ground if she had given it enough time. Clarke’s lips curled into a smile when she remembered that they had exchanged numbers, and she scrolled through her contacts to find it.</p>
<p>Was it too soon to text her? Maybe she had already forgotten? Clarke’s eyes fell upon the stranger’s contact info –“Bus stop Lexa”- and wondered. Maybe she should have put a small memo alongside her name in the other woman’s phone, just in case she wouldn’t remember. Maybe something along the lines of “damsel-in-distress Clarke” or “Blonde-disaster-who-can’t-fight Clarke”? She laughed at herself, and then hoped that maybe Lexa would have remembered her at least from her unusual name.</p>
<p>Tentatively, she started writing a text. She wanted to make good on her offer to the brunette because she was genuinely grateful, and also because she really wanted to see her again and learn more about her. It took several drafts but she eventually managed to come up with something that sounded both casual and friendly.</p>
<p>Clarke: <em>Hey, it’s Clarke (from the bus stop this morning). I hope u made it to class ok. My offer for coffee still stands if ur up for it. Let me know :)</em></p>
<p>She hit send and got out of bed to whip up some dinner for herself. She stumbled into Octavia in the kitchen. Her roommates were back from class; they were used to Clarke’s different schedule and knew not to disturb her when she spent entire afternoons catching up on sleep after a night shift.</p>
<p>‘<em>Rough night?</em>’ Octavia asked as Clarke brushed past her to get to the fridge.</p>
<p>‘<em>Not much to do actually, I spent most of my shift playing Uno with Bellamy.</em>’</p>
<p>Bellamy was Octavia’s older brother and he was a resident in the same unit as Clarke. They often found themselves on the same shifts and had come up with several ways to pass the time when it was particularly slow at night, including Uno and board games. Because they spent so much time being bored together, they had bonded quickly over the course of a few months and Bellamy was one of Clarke’s close friends now.</p>
<p>‘<em>Oh, I just made mac and cheese, there are leftovers if you want.</em>’ Octavia said, pointing to the top of the counter. ‘<em>I’m going to Lincoln’s tonight, but we can catch up later, okay?</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>Yeah, sure! Have fun, O. And thanks.</em>’</p>
<p>Clarke hadn’t really had the chance to talk to Octavia since their little heart-to-heart in the bathroom. She was a little disappointed to see her best friend go, especially since they had spent so little time together in the past week. In fact, Clarke hadn’t been able to join Raven and her at the club the previous weekend because she had to cover one of her workmate’s shifts on Sunday as an exception, but at least there was still their movie night on Fridays. The three of them always made sure to be available for their weekly reunion and it was always a fun girls’ night Clarke looked forward to after a long week.</p>
<p>Her phone chimed as she was just finishing her plate and Clarke immediately opened her text messages to find a reply from Lexa.</p>
<p>Bus stop Lexa: <em>Hi! I was late to class but no regrets. I’d love coffee, when are you free?</em></p>
<p>Clarke grinned at the text and had to stop herself from typing a response right away. She didn’t want to appear too eager. Instead, she put away the dishes and let a few minutes go by before answering.</p>
<p>Clarke: <em>I work at the hospital Monday to Friday until 7pm. Lunch break around 1pm usually.</em></p>
<p>Bus stop Lexa: <em>That’s cool, i live very close. I can do tomorrow at 1. Sounds good for you?</em></p>
<p>Clarke: <em>Perfect. See u then!</em></p>
<p>Bus stop Lexa: <em>Can’t wait ;)</em></p>
<p>Clarke was smiling giddily by the time she put down her phone. A winking emoji was a risqué thing to send to someone who was almost a stranger and anybody other than her would have found it too friendly, but Clarke liked it. Lexa’s texting persona seemed more flirtatious than her real-life one, not that she was complaining. For some reason, she found herself eager to get to the next day.</p>
<p>***</p>
<p>Clarke was impatient to get through her morning shift. The idea of seeing the pretty brunette again had been on her mind since she had woken up. Of course, she was aware that it was merely a “thank you” coffee over her lunch break and in no way a date, but <em>maybe</em> she had put extra care in her make up before leaving for work, and <em>maybe</em> she had chosen a shirt that showed a little cleavage to wear underneath her scrubs. Lexa may be little more than a stranger and she may not even be interested in her or even in women in general, but a girl had to try at least.</p>
<p>Usually, Clarke would have stayed a little longer to make small talk with her last patient of the morning, an elderly man who was recovering from a stroke, however this time she was quick to take her leave after the follow-up. She sent a text to Lexa, asking her to meet her in front of the main entrance to the hospital, before heading outside to wait for her.</p>
<p>Surprisingly, the brunette was already there, sitting on a bench next to her crutch (or was it a lethal weapon?), and Clarke noted that she was a couple of minutes early. Either Lexa was one of those control freaks that were always on time –which was fine, Clarke was not complaining- or she was as eager as the blonde.</p>
<p>‘<em>Hello, Clarke.</em>’ The young woman stood upon seeing her.</p>
<p>‘<em>Hi!</em>’</p>
<p>Clarke smiled back and hesitated for a moment. Was she supposed to hug her? Or shake her hand maybe? The latter seemed too formal and Clarke didn’t want to invade Lexa’s personal space, so she settled for an awkward squeeze of the brunette’s forearm before mentally cursing her lack of chill. Sometimes she wished she had Raven’s ability to always know how to act in social situations. It was always easier when she’d had a few drinks. She could almost hear her best friend’s voice in her head. <em>What the fuck Griffin?! It’s like you’ve never met a human before!</em></p>
<p>Lexa may have been surprised by Clarke’s strange greeting but she didn’t comment on it. She was wearing a light green blouse tucked into a pair of tight-fitting dark jeans and -oh my god those legs. They were lean and shapely and Clarke couldn’t help but think that they must be firm to the touch… <em>Calm your tits you thirsty bitch.</em> (There was Raven again.) Clarke cleared her head, shaking off the unwanted thoughts before concentrating on acting like a normal person.</p>
<p>‘<em>I know a place right around the corner that does really cool latte art. They also have food if you haven’t eaten yet. Wanna go?</em>’ She asked.</p>
<p>Lexa agreed and Clarke led the way. They walked side by side, mostly talking about how their day had gone so far. The weather was nice and warm so they settled at a table outside the café. Lexa ordered a chai latte and Clarke a double expresso and a sandwich for later.</p>
<p>‘<em>So, you’re a doctor then?</em>’ The brunette asked, fiddling with the ring on her index finger.</p>
<p>The sunlight was shining in her face and she had to squint uncomfortably, but it made her eyes look even more stunning. Clarke realized they were a beautiful jade green color, enhanced by her matching blouse.</p>
<p>‘<em>You wanna trade places? Or sit somewhere else?</em>’ Clarke offered when Lexa had to use her hand to shield her eyes from the sun.</p>
<p>Lexa accepted gratefully and they found another table in the shadow. To Clarke’s dismay, the lighting on the brunette’s face was not as good and she couldn’t continue her close study of the cute little freckles that were sprinkled across her nose. Seeing Lexa’s expectant gaze, Clarke realized she hadn’t answered her previous question.</p>
<p>‘<em>Oh, I’m not exactly a doctor yet. I’m in my first year of residency, so hopefully I’ll be one someday.</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>What kind?</em>’ Lexa inquired.</p>
<p>‘<em>A neurologist.</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>That sounds pretty cool.</em>’ The brunette nodded appreciatively. ‘<em>Not that I really know what that means, though…</em>’</p>
<p>She took a sip of her coffee and Clarke almost had a mental breakdown watching her plump lips wrap around the edge of the cup.</p>
<p>‘<em>Oh that’s- the brain and all that. People tend to think I’m a nerd for saying this but I think the nervous system is actually fascinating. I’ve wanted to do this job for a very long time actually.</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>Well I’m sure you’re going to be a great doctor. For one thing, those scrubs look really good on you.</em>’</p>
<p>Lexa blushed as soon as those words left her lips and the shade did nothing to hide the redness of her cheeks from Clarke. The blonde smirked, feeling pleased with herself. Maybe she wasn’t the only one who couldn’t keep it together. She took pity on Lexa and decided to let it slide.</p>
<p>‘<em>Oh yeah, sorry. I didn’t bother changing before meeting with you. The weather is actually quite warm now.</em>’</p>
<p>Clarke gave herself a mental high-five as she unbuttoned her scrubs to reveal the grey low-cut shirt she was wearing underneath. <em>Very smooth, Griffin.</em> She didn’t miss the way Lexa’s eyes widened as they were automatically drawn to her chest. There was no way that girl was straight because she was looking at her breasts like she had just seen Freddie Mercury come back from the dead.</p>
<p>‘<em>So anyway.</em>’ Clarke cleared her throat and Lexa’s eyes snapped up automatically. ‘<em>You didn’t tell me what you did. Judging by the little trick you pulled yesterday, I’m guessing you’re some kind of part-time urban ninja?</em>’</p>
<p>Lexa snorted and the blush of her cheeks faded slightly.</p>
<p>‘<em>Yeah close enough. I used to be in the military. I was a sergeant.</em>’ She said with a hint of smugness in her smile.</p>
<p>Clarke was impressed. That was another thing she hadn’t expected, and now she was picturing the brunette in her uniform.</p>
<p>‘<em>Used to?</em>’ She asked nonetheless.</p>
<p>‘<em>Yeah, I’m a law student now. First year.</em>’</p>
<p>Clarke raised her eyebrows. She was even more impressed now. For whatever reason, the young woman had completely changed career paths and done a complete U-turn.</p>
<p>‘<em>Why did you leave the military?</em>’ Clarke asked, before adding quickly, ‘<em>I hope it’s not too indiscrete of me to ask.</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>No that’s fine, it’s a long story.</em>’ Lexa said, jutting her chin towards her crutch that was resting against the edge of their table. ‘<em>I had an accident on the job and let’s just say I can’t run as well as I used to now. It was not really my choice to quit, but law was something I was considering in high school so I just went back to it I guess.</em>’</p>
<p>Clarke nodded thoughtfully and decided not to push the subject any further.</p>
<p>‘<em>My best friend’s boyfriend, Lincoln, he’s a law student here too. He’s a big guy, tall and bulky with a short mohawk, maybe you know him?</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>Oh yeah, Linc! He’s my childhood best friend. We practically shared the same diapers!</em>’ Lexa replied excitedly.</p>
<p>Now that was interesting. At least Clarke knew who to turn to if she ever needed information about Lexa and was too afraid to ask directly. Not that she ever planned on doing that. That was creepy. And wrong. And totally not like her. <em>Bullshit.</em></p>
<p>‘<em>We’ve only met a couple of times actually. Octavia and I live together so he often comes over. He’s a great guy from what I’ve seen.</em>’ Clarke went on, testing the waters.</p>
<p>‘<em>Oh yeah he is.</em>’ Lexa nodded in appreciation, stirring the spoon in her coffee for good measure. ‘<em>He’s been by my side through thick and thin. I’m really happy he found Octavia. She seems like a good person for him.</em>’</p>
<p>Clarke realized that they were now hovering around the delicate subject of relationships. She wanted confirmation about the brunette’s sexual orientation before bringing out the big guns and unleashing her inner flirt, but she didn’t want to come off as too insistent. They still barely knew each other and Clarke couldn’t think of any subtle way to obtain that kind of information, so she figured she’d use her newly found network and do some research on her own. A little push couldn’t hurt, right?</p>
<p>But her doubts about Lexa’s potential attraction to women were rapidly dwindling as she noticed the obvious stares the brunette was giving her when she thought she wasn’t looking. Jade green eyes were swiftly drifting down to her cleavage each time Clarke looked down to take a sip of her coffee. She could feel the intense gaze on her, burning hot as though it tried to peel away layers of skin to leave her bare. Clarke’s confidence grew exponentially when she untied her hair nonchalantly to let her blonde curls cascade down her shoulders and caught Lexa almost choking on her latte.</p>
<p>Well, that wasn’t very smooth, but it had the intended effect. Yep, this girl was as straight as a Chinese noodle.</p>
<p>Clarke almost lost herself studying Lexa’s perfectly sculpted face while they continued talking. The young woman’s bone structure was a gift from the heavens: her wide eyes were complimented by a slim nose and full, pouty lips, a mixture of softness and well-defined angles. Her hair was pulled up in a ponytail from which a few loose strands escaped, framing her regal cheekbones.</p>
<p>‘<em>Clarke?</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>Huh?</em>’ Clarke snapped out of her contemplation upon hearing Lexa’s voice.</p>
<p>‘<em>Not that I want to cut this short but didn’t you say you were supposed to be back at 2?</em>’</p>
<p>Clarke stole a look at her phone –it was 1:59. The sudden realization that she had to go back to work felt like a dip in a frozen pool; she had barely seen the hour go by. Learning about the brunette had been exciting and once they had started getting to know each other, neither of them wanted to stop.</p>
<p>‘<em>Oh fuck- I mean, yeah I need to get going.</em>’ She fumbled over herself like a pathetic mess, retrieving her phone and her purse after paying for their orders.</p>
<p>‘<em>Thanks a lot for this, I had a really good time talking to you.</em>’ Lexa said as she stood up from her chair.</p>
<p>‘<em>Me too, that was really nice.</em>’</p>
<p>They walked back to the front of the hospital together since Lexa had to ride the subway to attend her afternoon classes. For the second time in two days, they faced each other awkwardly, unwilling to put an end to the moment but not knowing quite well how to proceed.</p>
<p>‘<em>So um, would you be open to doing this again soon?</em>’ Lexa finally asked, toeing her crutch absent-mindedly.</p>
<p>Her face was slightly flushed and Clarke was grateful that the brunette had asked because she didn’t know if she would have taken it upon herself to do so.</p>
<p>‘<em>Sure, do you have any other tricks in store with that baton of justice?</em>’ Clarke replied with a smile, motioning to Lexa’s crutch. ‘<em>Anything else worth a coffee?</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>I can think of a few things, yeah.</em>’ Lexa chuckled. ‘<em>Doesn’t have to be coffee, though.</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>Oh?</em>’ Clarke smirked. Was that an innuendo?</p>
<p>‘<em>Tea!</em>’ The brunette clarified quickly, her adorably small ears turning a bashful red. ‘<em>Tea is good too, right?</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>Yeah, tea is good.</em>’ Clarke nodded.</p>
<p>‘<em>Okay, cool. We’ll keep in touch then.</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>Of course!</em>’ Clarke grinned before setting off with an awkward wave of her hand.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Chapter 4</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Lexa POV: With a little push from Anya, Lexa asks Clarke out and they spend some quality time together.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Sorry for the wait, I had a lot of things on my hands... to make up for it, this chapter is a little bit longer and I'm pretty happy with how it turned out. As usual, kudos and comments are always welcome and constructive criticism is appreciated :) Enjoy! x</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <hr/><p>               Lexa couldn’t help thinking about Clarke every time she passed the hospital on her walk home from the bus stop. Her eyes drifted to the main entrance like they had every other night of that week, as if she were expecting the blonde to simply walk out of the building right at that moment. Maybe now that Lexa roughly knew her work schedule, she was trying to force the hand of fate and be in the area around the time Clarke would be clocking off her shift. But as Lexa tightened the lapels of her jacket around herself, shivering slightly in the cool air of the early evening, she convinced herself not to think too much about it.</p><p>She hadn’t gotten any news from Clarke since their conversation at the café, and to be fair, Lexa had been busy with her classes all week so she hadn’t exactly tried to initiate anything over text either. Maybe she had found herself in bed at night, thinking about Clarke; thinking about that cute beauty spot above her upper lip, about the dizzying dip of her cleavage –which she had definitely not spent a whole hour checking out-, about those bright blue eyes and that raspy laugh that somehow sounded like chimes. Maybe those thoughts and images had left her mind reeling with a sizzling need that extended between her legs, and again, <em>maybe</em> she had taken care of it with her vibrator once or twice, safe in the knowledge that Clarke would never know about it.</p><p>Lexa wanted to see her again but she didn’t know how. She was never good at flirting. She had not gone on a date since she met Costia and her game was severely lacking, as Anya liked to remind her. She unlocked her phone and started typing a text to her cousin. Her reply was almost immediate.</p><p>Lexa: <em>Hey, you off tonight?</em></p><p>Anya: <em>Yea, why?</em></p><p>Lexa: <em>wanna come over? There’s pizza in the fridge.</em></p><p>Anya: <em>Say no more.</em> <em>be there in 30.</em></p><p>Lexa pocketed her phone and hurried back to her apartment, picking up her pace as much as her crutch allowed it in order to get out of the cold. Once she was home, she tidied up a little bit. She had a tendency to be messy –not too much, just the right amount- but she hated when her cousin teased her about it. She put a couple of beers in the fridge for later and before she knew it, Anya was knocking at the door.</p><p>‘<em>Yeah, come in!</em>’</p><p>The older woman barged in, a bottle of red wine in her right hand and a box of pastries in the other, looking like she meant business.</p><p>‘<em>Hey kiddo. Buckle your seatbelt because we’re going to drink tonight.</em>’</p><p>‘<em>Hello to you too.</em>’ Lexa said, walking over to her cousin to give her a hug. ‘<em>What’s the occasion?</em>’</p><p>Any kicked off her shoes haphazardly in front of the couch before sitting down.</p><p>‘<em>I haven’t seen you in over two weeks, we need to catch up.</em>’</p><p>‘<em>And? Getting wasted is mandatory for this?</em>’ Lexa inquired with a smirk, although she wasn’t one to complain –Anya was way more fun when she was drunk anyway.</p><p>Anya gave an eye roll before rummaging in Lexa’s kitchen cupboards to find glasses. She poured the wine and handed one of them to Lexa before slouching on the couch with her legs out, feet resting on top of the coffee table.</p><p>‘<em>Make yourself at home.</em>’ Lexa said with obvious sarcasm before joining her.</p><p>They drank and talked, and drank again and soon enough, Lexa felt her cheeks go warm with a light buzz. She loved those at-home dinner nights with Anya, although she was too proud to admit it. The older woman had a way of bringing out the fun in Lexa –as cousins, they really were a good match. As petulant and cocky as she could be, Anya was always there to lend a sympathetic ear when needed. Lexa would never say it to her face –Anya certainly didn’t need a boost in self-confidence- but she gave the best advice, too.</p><p>‘<em>Alright, now.</em>’ Anya said when they had finished the bottle of wine. ‘<em>Spill the tea: how is your tinder quest going?</em>’</p><p>Lexa groaned around her mouthful of pizza. In other circumstances, she would have shut Anya off and steered the conversation towards another subject, but her alcohol-addled brain deemed it a good idea to provide an honest answer.</p><p> ‘<em>I deleted the app.</em>’</p><p>‘<em>What?</em>’ Anya huffed, looking genuinely outraged. ‘<em>Listen here kiddo, I’m trying my best to help you get laid but if you want your virginity to grow back, just say the word and I’ll leave you to your knitting and crosswords.</em>’</p><p>‘<em>Very funny, Anya.</em>’ Lexa said, blushing a little. ‘<em>I kept receiving unsolicited nudes and really gross emoji combinations. People on there are just so horny, I couldn’t deal with it.</em>’</p><p>‘<em>Oh, my sweet summer child.</em>’ The older woman scoffed. ‘<em>That’s exactly what tinder is about. Did you expect anything less?</em>’</p><p>‘<em>Nope. Which is why I didn’t want it in the first place but you insisted.</em>’</p><p>‘<em>Fair.</em>’ Anya nodded, taking a swig of her beer and cocking her head to the side.</p><p>‘<em>Besides,</em>’ Lexa said, fiddling with the ring that sat on her middle finger. ‘<em>I kinda, uhh, met this girl. In real life…</em>’</p><p>Anya’s eyebrows rose into her hairline and she turned towards Lexa, facing her completely. The look she gave her left no opportunity other than to expand on the topic.</p><p>‘<em>Tell me more.</em>’</p><p>‘<em>There’s nothing to tell, really. I’ve only seen her twice and I barely know her, but she’s so funny and beautiful and I think I want to see her again.</em>’</p><p>‘<em>You think?</em>’ Anya teased, narrowing her eyes and testing the waters even as her lips curled into a smile. ‘<em>What do you mean, you –think-?</em>’</p><p>‘<em>Well, like I said I don’t really know much about her yet. I don’t know whether or not she’s single or if she’s into girls like that… although she seemed very flirty. Or maybe that was just her. I don’t know, Anya.</em>’</p><p>‘<em>Fucking hell, Lex! I’m straight as a pole but my gaydar is better than yours. Did she laugh a lot? Smile at you? Blush? Were there any signs that she might be attracted to you?</em>’</p><p>‘<em>I don’t know.</em>’ Lexa repeated. ‘<em>Before leaving, I mentioned, uh, seeing her again… and she sounded game. She said yes. But maybe she was being polite. She might be looking for friends, for all I know.</em>’</p><p>Anya questioned her like she had been part of the Spanish Inquisition in another life, and Lexa proceeded to recount her first encounter with Clarke, launching herself into a detailed description of the blonde. Anya sat and listened as she rambled about Clarke’s hair and Clarke’s smile and the little freckle above Clarke’s lips.</p><p>‘<em>God, you’re a sap.</em>’ Anya quipped with a smile after Lexa was done monologuing.</p><p>‘<em>Shut up, I’m not!</em>’</p><p>‘<em>Yes you are.</em>’</p><p>‘<em>Okay.</em>’</p><p>‘<em>So, what are you going to do about it? You’re going to see her again?</em>’ Anya prompted, elbowing Lexa to get more information out of her.</p><p>‘<em>I want to,</em>’ She admitted nervously, ‘<em>I just don’t know how to do that. I was the one who offered so I guess the ball is in my court now.</em>’</p><p>‘<em>Oh, hell.</em>’ Anya groaned, burying her face in her palm out of frustration. ‘<em>You’re such a useless gay. A fucking stool has more game than you, that’s probably why girls sit on stools more than they sit on your face. Be a stool, Lexa.</em>’</p><p>‘<em>Got it.</em>’ Lexa replied, more to shut Anya up than anything. Her face was burning hot. ‘<em>So… should I text her?</em>’</p><p>‘<em>Please.</em>’ The older woman drawled, rolling her eyes. ‘<em>If you don’t text her right now I’ll have to do it for you and trust me you’re going to wish I didn’t.</em>’</p><p>‘<em>You’re mean.</em>’ Lexa huffed as she retrieved her phone from her jeans pocket.</p><p>‘<em>I know, but what would you do without me?</em>’</p><p>Lexa made a face before sending a message to Clarke, asking her to go for a walk out in the botanic garden the following weekend –Anya’s idea. The weather forecast predicted warm temperatures and she liked being outside. She was hoping Clarke shared her love of nature and the outdoors.</p><p>‘<em>Happy?</em>’ Lexa asked with a huff as she put her phone down.</p><p>It was only playful though. Deep down, she knew that Anya was right to push her a little. Lexa would probably never get anything done if it weren’t for her cousin’s ability to be a real pain in the ass.</p><p>‘<em>Very.</em>’ Anya responded with a smirk, chugging the last of her beer.</p><p>Lexa had almost downed her first beer as well. Add to that the four glasses of wine she’d had before and her vision was seriously starting to spin. The room was hot and her cheeks were warm and her speech was slurred. Anya was not faring much better; she was only just slightly less drunk.</p><p>‘<em>How did your date with Gus go by the way?</em>’</p><p>‘<em>Oh it was great.</em>’ Anya said, smiling broadly as she leaned against the back of the couch. ‘<em>He took me to this restaurant in the city, all pretty with fairy lights and nice music. Then we went to the movies. And we ended up at his place.</em>’ She had a dreamy look on her face that made her seem oddly inoffensive. ‘<em>He really went all out.</em>’</p><p>‘<em>And they say I’m a sap!</em>’ Lexa joked teasingly, nudging Anya’s shoulder with her elbow. The older woman only glared at her before going on.</p><p>‘<em>He has a king size bed and we had the most mind-blowing sex in it. He’s so good-</em>‘</p><p>‘<em>Alright, alright! That’s enough information.</em>’</p><p>‘ <em>-we changed the sheets twice in the span of a night.</em>’</p><p>‘<em>Fuck no, gross! I did </em>not<em> need to know that!</em>’ Lexa whined, outraged.</p><p>The next morning, Lexa woke up in her own bed with Anya snoring loudly beside her. She could still taste the wine and beer on her tongue and her temples were throbbing slightly. She shifted onto her side with a sleepy groan, wiping away some drool at the corner of her mouth and reaching out to her phone on the nightstand. She cursed at the bright light that invaded her pupils and squinted. It was still early, she still had time to shower and have breakfast before going to her classes.</p><p>She checked her notifications, and her hangover was significantly lessened when she saw three unopened texts from Clarke.</p><p>Clarke: <em>Hey, how r u? that would be great :) does Sunday work for u?</em></p><p>Clarke: <em>sorry, it’s like 3am. i’m not sleepwalking, just in the middle of a boring night shift.</em></p><p>Clarke: <em>looking forward 2 see u!</em></p><p>***</p><p>Lexa had opted to wear her black biker shorts and a green racer top with a jacket. It was sunny outside and she had planned to meet Clarke at the entrance of the gardens, close to the city river. She got off the bus just as she received a text from the blonde, signaling that she was already there. There was that familiar yet daunting feeling in the pit of her stomach, a twist and pull that grew stronger as she neared her destination, and she did her best to ignore it.</p><p>Sure enough, Clarke was already standing there by the gate. Lexa hoped the blonde didn’t notice her doing a double take. Clarke smiled broadly at her and put her phone back into her purse when she saw Lexa. She had sunglasses on. Her hair was pulled up in a messy bun and loose, wispy strands were framing her face like a golden halo. She was wearing a skirt that stopped a few inches above her knees and a shirt. Lexa noted with some relief that it covered more of the blonde’s cleavage now, which would make her less likely to stare and get caught red-handed.</p><p>‘<em>I don’t come here very often.</em>’ Clarke admitted after they had exchanged greetings and an awkward hug. ‘<em>Shall we go this way?</em>’</p><p>‘<em>Yeah, sure.</em>’ Lexa smiled, taking the lead. ‘<em>I love this place. It’s really nice in the summer and it has some beautiful paths. It’s my favorite place to go to when I’m having a bad week. So peaceful...</em>’</p><p>‘<em>I can see that.</em>’ Clarke nodded in appreciation at the lush green that surrounded them. ‘<em>Do you have them often?</em>’</p><p>‘<em>Huh?</em>’</p><p>‘<em>Bad weeks.</em>’ The blonde clarified.</p><p>‘<em>Oh, right. No, not lately. It’s been mostly good these past few months. It’s just that, sometimes I get a bit overwhelmed.</em>’ Lexa said. She didn’t want to lay it all out on Clarke right now.</p><p>‘<em>I understand. I get that too, with the hospital and all… Sometimes it’s a lot to take in and I just need to be in the quiet.</em>’</p><p>Clarke was walking slowly and without purpose, admiring the blooming trees and the lilies that grew scattered across the lawn. She was smiling brightly and there was something so endearing in the way she stared in awe, discovering every little detail Lexa already knew by heart.</p><p>‘<em>And where do you go when you need the quiet?</em>’ She asked.</p><p>‘<em>I usually just stay in my room and have some alone time.</em>’ Clarke replied before adding pointedly: ‘<em>I put some music on and I paint.’</em></p><p>‘<em>Really?</em>’ Lexa said. ‘<em>So you’re a doctor who paints?</em>’</p><p>‘<em>Future doctor.</em>’ Clarke corrected smugly. ‘<em>But yeah, I do. It’s not great art, I’m no Van Gogh or Matisse, but I like it, it’s freeing.</em>’</p><p>‘<em>Oh come on, I’m sure it’s beautiful. I’d love to see one of your works.</em>’</p><p>Clarke blushed and looked down at the ground. So much for the flirty confidence she had demonstrated at the café. Lexa was completely entranced by the way her blonde locks caught the sunlight and by the way Clarke tucked a strand of hair behind her ear with a bashful half-smile in her direction.</p><p>‘<em>I’ll see what I can do.</em>’ The blonde said, grinning, before turning back to the magnolia tree which she pretended to inspect to hide her reddening cheeks. Lexa had caught on to it, the trick being a well-known favorite of hers as well.</p><p>She reached inside of her messenger bag and retrieved her reflex camera to snap a few shots while Clarke wandered around to read the small signs in front of the flowerbeds. Taking pictures was a hobby that she had taken up since moving here to study, and the camera was a Christmas gift from her friends. Clarke standing there, surrounded with the bushes and the flowers made for a beautifully composed shot, and Lexa hesitated for a second before asking.</p><p>‘<em>Do you mind if I take your picture? It’s a really nice background.</em>’ She said. And then, noticing how she had complimented the background rather than the subject, she added. ‘<em>And… you look really good too.</em>’</p><p>Clarke chuckled but gave her the go-ahead, not really moving but rather letting Lexa do as she pleased with the angle while the blonde kept admiring her surroundings.</p><p>‘<em>Why are you laughing?</em>’ Lexa asked, her eyebrows quirked up.</p><p>‘<em>Your ears are all red. It’s cute.</em>’ Clarke replied with a smile.</p><p>‘<em>Oh.</em>’ Lexa croaked and she was sure the blush had extended to her neck now.</p><p>‘<em>If I show you some of my art, it’s only fair I get to see some of the photos you took.</em>’</p><p>‘<em>Is that an I’ll-show-you-mine-if-you-show-me-yours situation?</em>’ Lexa asked with a playful smirk as she put the cover back on the lens and tucked the camera away in her bag.</p><p>‘<em>I think it is.</em>’</p><p>Clarke was beaming now and Lexa loved the playful banter that was going on between them. They continued walking for over an hour. She took Clarke to her favorite spots in the garden, took some more pictures while they chatted away and got to know each other a little more. Lexa learned that Clarke was a party-animal and that she had a lot of crazy party anecdotes, including one that involved her, her best friend Raven and a garbage truck (Lexa laughed out loud at that one, startling an elderly couple that was having tea on a nearby bench).</p><p>In turn, Lexa told her about her cousin Anya who owned a café and how she was often invited and brought Lincoln along whenever there was a special event. Anya would host karaoke nights once a week. On some nights, people were a little shy to be the first to go so Anya would break the ice by singing a Taylor Swift song and urging Lexa along, which was humiliating. Clarke insisted that Lexa invite her to the next karaoke night because she was dying to see that.</p><p>‘<em>Do you mind if we sit for a minute?</em>’ Lexa asked after a while, wincing a little at the throbbing pain that was starting in her leg.</p><p>She had taken her meds in the morning but hadn’t bothered to bring them along. She didn’t think they would be spending so much time walking.</p><p>‘<em>Yeah sure. Are you okay?</em>’ Clarke asked as she led Lexa to the nearest bench and helped her sit down.</p><p>‘<em>I’m good. I just need a moment.</em>’</p><p>She put her crutch to the side and extended her leg, stretching it carefully before relaxing her muscles and sagging a little further into the back of the bench. Clarke put a careful hand on her knee and Lexa shivered under her touch, as innocent as it was.</p><p>‘<em>Can I help with anything? Do you want us to head back?</em>’ The blonde asked and there was a hint of sadness in her voice.</p><p>‘<em>It’s fine. I’m having a really good time talking to you, I don’t want to leave just yet… unless you want to?</em>’</p><p>‘<em>I don’t want to either.</em>’ Clarke smiled softly.</p><p>Her hand was still on Lexa’s knee and now she was tracing small circles with her palm. Lexa felt her cheeks grow hot under the gentle attention. The sun was not as bright anymore and it had started to go down a little, hidden by the trees. Clarke had taken her sunglasses off and now Lexa was met once again with the bluest gaze she had ever seen. It was comforting and intimidating at the same time. She was tempted to put her hand on top of Clarke’s but she didn’t.</p><p>They continued to chat while sitting on the bench and talked about their respective friends and families for a while. Lexa learned that Clarke’s father had died in a car accident and that her mother worked as head surgeon in the same hospital as her. Lexa told Clarke that her parents divorced when she was young and that her father now lived on a farm out of state. She had sort of lost contact with her mother who was travelling a lot for work and could not be bothered to keep in touch.</p><p>‘<em>There’s one place I haven’t shown you yet. I think you’ll love it.</em>’ Lexa said when the early evening sky had turned a beautiful candy floss pink.</p><p>She retrieved her crutch and stood, taking Clarke’s hand instinctively to pull her up and lead the way. The blonde did not seem to object but when Lexa noticed what she had done, she mumbled an apology and pulled away. She took Clarke to the very edge of the garden, where the trees gave way to the bank of the river. There was a short wooden pier there and it was the perfect spot to watch the sunset. Lexa liked to come here to take pictures or simply take in the silence and the view.</p><p>‘<em>Wow, Lexa… this is wonderful!</em>’ Clarke said, whispering as if she feared she would be disturbing the quiet.</p><p>‘<em>Yeah, it is.</em>’</p><p>They sat side by side on the edge of the pier, their legs dangling above the water. The sky was simply stunning, with all shades of blue, orange and pink over the horizon. The first stars were already showing above their heads and Lexa wished she could immortalize the sight in a picture, but she wouldn’t dare to break the moment between them. They sat so close that their arms kept brushing against each other, but neither of them made anything of it. The two artists seemed to have settled into a silent, mutual understanding of the beauty that surrounded them there and then.</p><p>It was only when the sky had grown dark and Clarke started shivering slightly beside her that Lexa decided to call it a night. They headed back to the bus stop and when they eventually parted ways, Clarke sent Lexa off with a kiss on the cheek.</p><p>Later that night, as she was getting into bed, Lexa received a text from Clarke with a picture attached. It was an abstract painting and Lexa could not really tell what it represented, but the shades of blue, orange, pink and green were a nice reminder of the day they had just spent together.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Chapter 5</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Clarke POV: After a little inside help, Clarke plans her next move.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Chapter 5 it is! It's a very quick update and a little shorter than usual because it's sort of a filler chapter. I wanted to get it out of the way so I could start writing the interesting stuff. Things are moving forward very soon ;)</p>
<p>Thank you all for your kind feedback on chapter 4, it's always exciting to know what you guys think and it fuels me to write more so please, never stop! :D</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <hr/>
<p>‘<em>So how have you been?</em>’</p>
<p>Abby slumped into her chair after giving Clarke a hug. She looked exhausted, with dark circles under her eyes and more lines on her face than Clarke remembered; they really needed to spend more time together outside of the hospital.</p>
<p>‘<em>Oh I’m alright. You look tired mom, is everything okay?</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>Yes, I will be once I get a day off.</em>’ Abby replied with a sigh. ‘<em>I’ve been working almost non-stop for the past few weeks. I lost a patient the other day.</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>I’m sorry.</em>’ Clarke said.</p>
<p>It wouldn’t be the first time her mother had to go through this. Being a doctor, and head surgeon at that, death was basically part of the job. Clarke recalled several instances in her childhood when her mother had come home late at night on the verge of tears, only to crumble in her husband’s arms.</p>
<p>‘<em>How is the hospital treating you? Are you eating well? I hope you’re getting enough sleep, I saw those pictures Raven posted the other day, it looks like you guys are going out a lot.</em>’</p>
<p>It wasn’t disapproving, merely concerned, yet Clarke still felt compelled to give Abby an eye roll.</p>
<p>‘<em>Yes mom, I’m doing fine. And we haven’t been going out as much lately. I’m actually two weeks sober.</em>’ She added, just to make her mother cringe.</p>
<p>‘<em>Ha, you’re funny.</em>’ Abby deadpanned. ‘<em>Talk to me, Clarke. I need an update on your life, I feel like it’s been ages since we last did this.</em>’</p>
<p>She looked around. They were in the hospital cafeteria; it was one of those rare instances where they had the time to grab lunch together and chat. The place was usually quiet, mostly patients and visitors. When Clarke was alone, she usually ate on the go in the on-call room with whoever was working on her shift, so it was nice to actually sit down and take the time for a while.</p>
<p>Clarke thought back on the previous day, and her date –<em>date?</em>- with Lexa. She thought back on how she had kissed the brunette’s cheek before they parted. Lexa had blushed instantly but she had accepted the kiss without flinching, her vivid green eyes delving into her own afterwards. There were crinkles at the corner of her eyes when she smiled. She smelled of pine with a hint of jasmine. Should Clarke even be remembering such small details?</p>
<p>‘<em>Not much, the usual. Busy at work. Raven and Octavia are doing well, they say hi.</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>How nice of them.</em>’ Abby acknowledged before taking a bite out of her salmon sandwich and pressing on: ‘<em>Come on, give me something! I’ve barely had a life lately. What is new for you? Any changes that I should be aware of?</em>’</p>
<p>The way her mother quirked her eyebrows with a conspiratorial smile made Clarke rethink this whole idea of having a lunch date with her. Abby was a good person; she knew when to give Clarke space, especially given the fact that they shared the same workplace, but when she had her she held on to her like a gossipy teenager hungry for the most intimate details of her life.</p>
<p>‘<em>Oh my god, can you not be so pushy? What do you want to know?</em>’Clarke gave a breathy, defensive laugh and Abby leaned back in her seat with a soft smile.</p>
<p>‘<em>I’m sorry; I know it’s indiscrete of me.</em>’ She said in apology. ‘<em>I just want to make sure my daughter is happy and surrounded.</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>Well I have Raven and O…</em>’ Clarke replied, recalling her conversation with Octavia a few weeks back.</p>
<p>Abby hummed thoughtfully, scanning Clarke’s face as though she were trying to read her mind and extract the information herself. By the looks of it, Clarke’s wary expression and her hand fiddling with her bracelet were enough to give away the information Abby needed. The older woman knew not to push any further, however. It was Clarke who caved in under her mother’s dubious gaze.</p>
<p>‘<em>Mom, I met someone.</em>’ She blurted out, staring into her own lap. In her peripheral vision, she could see Abby’s triumphant smile.</p>
<p>‘<em>I knew it! Call it maternal instinct! Tell me about him.</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>It’s a she.</em>’ Clarke added, looking up to gauge her mother’s reaction. Abby’s smile didn’t fade but the corners of her lips twitched slightly in surprise.</p>
<p>‘<em>Oh well, I look forward to meeting her.</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>We’re not together, but I really like her.</em>’ Clarke admitted, and she couldn’t help but smile as the thought of Lexa. ‘<em>She’s sweet and we get along really well.</em>’</p>
<p>She wanted to tell her mother how much she loved Lexa’s eyes and Lexa’s hair and Lexa’s thoughtfulness and her artistic streak and how they just seemed to click together. Clarke had rarely met someone so easy to talk to, and yet who intimidated her so much all at the same time. Even with Finn, with whom she had been very much in love at one point, it had taken some time to build a sense of ease and familiarity. Lexa was simply warm and comfortable to be around, even though they hadn’t known each other for long.</p>
<p>‘<em>I’m glad that you have her. I hope things go the way you want to.</em>’ Abby assured with a tight smile that almost made Clarke question her sincerity.</p>
<p>She had never mentioned to her that she was attracted to women. She had never felt the urge to do so, since she had never had a serious relationship with a woman, and she had never told Abby about her short-lived friends-with-benefits arrangement with Niylah.</p>
<p>‘<em>Are you okay?</em>’ Clarke asked upon noticing her mother’s strained enthusiasm.</p>
<p>Abby reached across the table to cover Clarke’s hand with hers and squeezing reassuringly.</p>
<p>‘<em>I’m happy for you, Clarke.</em>’ Her smile was sincere. ‘It surprised me, that’s all. I’d really like to meet this girl when you feel ready to introduce us. It doesn’t matter what’s in her pants, as long as she’s good for you.’</p>
<p>‘<em>We haven’t actually gone on a proper date yet. I just know I like her and I want to spend more time with her.</em>’</p>
<p>Abby nodded and gave Clarke one of those smiles that reminded her of her father. Jake Griffin was always closer to Clarke than Abby ever was. When he died, Abby had done her best to fill the void and make Clarke feel special in the same way. A lot of the times it felt forced; her daughter was not one of her patients that she could simply fix before going on with her day. It took a lot of work but sometimes she succeeded, and Clarke was grateful for the effort her mother put in. She squeezed Abby’s hand back in a silent thank you.</p>
<p>***</p>
<p>Clarke got off work early that evening. It had been an overall quiet day and she was excited to actually spend some time with Raven and Octavia. She walked into the apartment, shedding her jacket and her shoes and making a beeline for her room to change into more comfortable clothes. She slipped on her favorite hoodie and a pair of yoga pants.</p>
<p>Clarke was about to knock at Octavia’s door to make her presence known, but a repeated thudding coming from inside her best friend’s room as well as unmistakable muffled whimpers suggested that she was not alone in there. She had probably invited Lincoln over, thinking that they would have the place to themselves for a few hours before Clarke and Raven made it home. Clarke was not ready to risk seeing anything that might scar her memory forever so she decided to retreat to her room and wait patiently before venturing outside.</p>
<p>The noise could still be heard from her room so she put on her earphones, selected a playlist and took out a blank canvas to fill it with paints. Without realizing it, she found herself considering several shades of green and grey, assessing their likeness to the unique jade color of Lexa’s eyes. She had spent way too much time studying the various hues in the brunette’s pupils the day before, safe behind the cover of her own tinted sunglasses.</p>
<p>When she took off her earphones to go to the bathroom half an hour later, Clarke realized Octavia’s room was now silent. As if on cue, her best friend’s door flew open as she walked past it and Octavia and Lincoln came out. And then it was like a Mexican stand-off; neither party dared to speak first and there were several long seconds of silence before Octavia decided to talk, pulling them all out of their misery.</p>
<p>‘<em>Clarke.</em>’ She acknowledged with an awkwardly formal nod.</p>
<p>‘<em>Octavia.</em>’ Clarke mirrored, half-amused and half-embarassed on their behalf. ‘<em>Lincoln.</em>’ She added, turning to the tall, bulky man.</p>
<p>He was shirtless, wearing only sweatpants, and Clarke didn’t recall ever seeing him so small. He nodded back at Clarke.</p>
<p>‘<em>When did you get home?</em>’ Octavia asked, her voice a raspy croak.</p>
<p>‘<em>Almost an hour ago. That’s okay I had some music on. Didn’t hear anything</em>.’ She quipped with a cheeky smile.</p>
<p>‘<em>Oh god, this is awkward. I’ll do the dishes for the rest of the week and you won’t say a word to Raven, okay? She wouldn’t let me hear the end of it.</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>Deal.</em>’ Clarke grinned. ‘<em>Let’s never talk about it.</em>’</p>
<p>Later that night, Clarke was sitting at the kitchen table with Raven and Octavia. The latter had not managed to convince Lincoln to stay for dinner, so it was just the three of them. They had ordered take-out from the sushi shop down the street and Raven was rambling animatedly about the highlight of her day: one of her fellow classmates had mixed two chemicals that supposedly did not go well together, unknowingly creating toxic gas. The entire third level of the building had to be evacuated and ventilated for the rest of the afternoon.</p>
<p>Octavia was in the middle of telling a story when Clarke’s phone buzzed inside of her jeans pocket. It was a text with a photo attached. Clarke recognized one of the pictures Lexa had taken of her in the botanic garden: she was crouching in front of a flowerbed, seemingly focused on reading whatever was written on the small plastic sign. Her hair was just slightly ruffled by the light breeze of the late afternoon. Behind her, the large magnolia tree in bloom was matching her shirt.</p>
<p>Clarke didn’t notice she was smiling widely as she texted Lexa her reply.</p>
<p>Clarke: <em>beautiful pic, you’re very talented! Thank u ;)</em></p>
<p>She kept her eyes fixated on the three small dots that appeared at the bottom of the screen to signal that Lexa was typing. Raven and Octavia were still talking but she barely listened. Her heart swelled when she read Lexa’s next text.</p>
<p>Bus stop Lexa: <em>I’m not usually that good. Maybe you should model for me someday? :)</em></p>
<p>Clarke:<em> is that a compliment?</em></p>
<p>Bus stop Lexa:<em> Maybe :)</em></p>
<p>Clarke:<em> aww shucks! Maybe u should model for me too then. I could paint u ;)</em></p>
<p>
  <em>‘Hey, Griffin!’</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>‘Earth to Clarke, come on!’</em>
</p>
<p>Clarke reluctantly tore her eyes away from her phone screen, setting the device face down in front of her.</p>
<p>‘<em>Who were you texting like that?</em>’ Raven asked with a knowing grin. ‘<em>Wait… was that Alexa?</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>It’s Lexa,</em>’ Octavia corrected with an excited smile. ‘<em>Fuck Clarke, you’re in deep.</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>Huh- what?</em>’ Clarke stammered, feeling the embarrassment settle on her cheeks already.</p>
<p>With a swift, practiced move, Raven snatched Clarke’s phone away to read her latest texts. Clarke leaned over the table, extending her arm to try and take it back but it was to no avail. The latina was scrolling greedily through the text conversation with the sadistic grin of someone who has just made a discovery. Clarke had briefly told them about Lexa after their conversation at the café, simply mentioning how pretty the girl looked and how nice she was.</p>
<p>‘<em>Holy shit, you’re actually flirting!</em>’ She exclaimed, brandishing Clarke’s phone in the air in a fist pump.</p>
<p>‘<em>Ugh, we’re not.</em>’ Clarke groaned exasperatedly under her friends’ playful stare.</p>
<p>‘<em>Yes you are. Compliments and shit. It’ grossly cute.</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>Rae, let me see that!</em>’ Octavia said, snatching the phone away from Raven’s hand to have a look. ‘<em>Oh yeah, that is totally flirting.</em>’</p>
<p>Clarke huffed, burying her face in her hands.</p>
<p>‘<em>Listen- stop that!</em>’ She said when Raven and Octavia snickered. ‘<em>It’s not like that. I don’t even know if she’s into girls.</em>’</p>
<p>Clarke retrieved her phone from Octavia, tucking it back safely in her pocket, away from her best friends’ prying hands.</p>
<p>‘<em>First of all, it’s funny you’re still doubting that even after the obvious flirting </em>she<em> initiated.</em>’ The brunette said with a light chuckle. ‘<em>Second of all, I did my research and I asked Lincoln. He told me that she was single and definitely a lesbian. Now that this piece of information is out there, you have to plan your next move, Clarke.</em>’</p>
<p>Clarke felt a strange sense of relief wash over her. The reality of potentially attempting something with Lexa was setting in, and she felt stupid and oblivious for even having doubted the brunette’s sexual orientation in the first place –after all, Lexa did fail the boob test. It was a tell-tale sign.</p>
<p>‘<em>Hey, I know,</em>’ Raven quipped mischievously. ‘<em>Why don’t you invite her to our movie night on Friday?</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>Huh? I thought that was a roommates night only? You’ve never invited Lincoln.</em>’ Clarke noted, turning to Octavia.</p>
<p>‘<em>Oh come on, it’s an emergency crisis. We won’t hold it against you.</em>’ She pressed on, nudging Clarke’s shoulder with her elbow.</p>
<p>‘<em>Yeah, you need to woo her.</em>’ Raven added.</p>
<p>‘<em>I don’t think we’re at that stage where we go to each other’s houses yet. It’s… intimidating.</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>You gotta start somewhere.</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>And how am I supposed to woo her with Raven sprawled on the couch in her unicorn onesie and making crass jokes a few feet away?</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>Hey!</em>’ Raven whined in mock offense, lifting her hands up in surrender. ‘<em>I’ll behave, okay? And it might actually be less awkward if we’re here to diffuse the tension, at least at the beginning.</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>We’ll be stealth if you need some time alone.</em>’ Octavia winked, popping the last sushi into her mouth.</p>
<p>Clarke huffed, pondering on the idea for a moment. It was not that bad, unlike most dating advice coming from Raven –a lot of them usually including a lap dance in a public place or making things explode just to show off- and she was right that introducing it as a girls’ night would sound less intimidating. She didn’t want Lexa to feel cornered or pressured in any way.</p>
<p>‘<em>Alright. I’ll ask her.</em>’ She conceded, pulling her phone out of her pocket to send the fateful offer.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. Chapter 6</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Lexa POV: Movie night with the girls, featuring "sleepy baby" Clarke and "embarassing mom" Raven.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Here goes :) Things are getting interesting, the next couple of chapters will be intense and I can't wait to write them, although I've got my hands full with uni at the moment so it might take a bit longer. We'll get there eventually!<br/>I hope you like this one, it was pretty tough to write so please let me know your thoughts!<br/>Cheers to you all and stay safe out there x</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <hr/>
<p>The following Friday night around 9, Lexa found herself knocking anxiously at Clarke’s apartment door. She heard footsteps coming from inside and quickly readjusted her braid, tucking a few strands of hair back just in time before the door opened. It was Clarke, and Lexa was relieved to see a familiar face. The blonde was dressed in an oversized t-shirt and ripped jeans; Lexa silently thanked her past self for choosing to go with the same kind of casual wear instead of something more elaborate and less comfortable.</p>
<p>‘<em>Hey,</em>’ The blonde greeted, beaming. ‘<em>I’m glad you came.</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>Thanks for inviting me. I uh- brought some popcorn.</em>’</p>
<p>Clarke gave Lexa a hug and ushered her in before closing the door behind them. The apartment was nice, noticeably bigger than hers which made sense since they were three sharing the same space. It was a little bit messy from being occupied by several people but had a homely atmosphere to it. Lexa found that some of the decoration reflected Clarke’s personality, such as the paintings on the wall above the TV set and next to the kitchen counter, or the weird statue of a cat walking on its hind legs that was on the coffee table. Other things such as a small model Harley-Davidson motorcycle were most likely not Clarke’s contribution.</p>
<p>‘<em>You can leave your stuff here.</em>’ She said, before looking around and gesturing towards the living room and open kitchen. ‘<em>Make yourself at home.</em>’</p>
<p>Lexa took off her jacket and followed the blonde into the living room. An energetic brunette appeared out of nowhere, hurtling into the room and startling Lexa. Another girl, taller and with darker hair, followed suit.</p>
<p>‘<em>Hey, you’re Lexa, right?</em>’ The brunette asked. Her eyes quickly darted to Lexa’s crutch but she didn’t comment on it; instead she gave her an enthusiastic side hug.</p>
<p>‘<em>Lexa, this is Raven.</em>’ Clarke said matter-of-factly. ‘<em>Usually inoffensive but will most likely make you uncomfortable at some point. You can just ignore her if she makes it weird.</em>’</p>
<p>Lexa scoffed, watching the easy banter that was taking place before her eyes when Raven raised her middle finger in Clarke’s face and the blonde stuck out her tongue in response.</p>
<p>‘<em>Nice to meet you Raven, I’ll keep that in mind for further notice.</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>Clarke is full of shit. I’m her favorite friend. It’s nice to meet you too.</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>First of all, </em>I’m<em> Clarke’s favorite friend,</em>’ the dark-haired girl told Raven before turning to Lexa, ‘<em>and Raven is totally a pain in the ass. We’ve met before through Lincoln I think.</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>Yeah, Octavia, I remember.</em>’ Lexa acknowledged with a smile.</p>
<p>The four of them made small talk and although Lexa had been slightly nervous coming in and meeting Clarke’s closest friends in their natural habitat, Raven and Octavia’s relaxed and nonchalant personalities eased her in pretty quickly. Soon, Raven was cracking jokes and Lexa found herself laughing along, barely registering how Clarke’s hand had settled on her shoulder.</p>
<p>When the laughter subsided, Lexa’s attention naturally gravitated back towards Clarke. The blonde was gazing at her and didn’t have the time to look away before Lexa caught her staring. Clarke cleared her throat and Lexa held back the dopey grin that was threatening to appear on her face.</p>
<p>‘<em>Your hair looks nice. I like it.</em>’ Clarke whispered, gesturing towards Lexa’s braid when Octavia and Raven moved to the kitchen to make some popcorn.</p>
<p>The blonde seemed to have given up on any subtlety now and she was staring right at Lexa, in such a way that she could feel the warmth of her bright blue eyes as they examined her face. Clarke was so close to her that Lexa was able to see every detail of her features. There was a dark freckle above Clarke’s left eyebrow that she had never noticed before and the brunette wondered how many more of those were hidden under layers of clothes, just waiting to be discovered. Her mind drifted to inappropriate places, and Lexa was very aware that Clarke’s eyes were still on her, waiting for a something, anything.</p>
<p>‘<em>Thank you,</em>’ she croaked out, blushing slightly.</p>
<p>The heat in her cheeks seemed to stir in other parts of her body, triggered by the unusual closeness. She could feel the warmth of Clarke’s hand as it brushed against hers and Lexa tentatively shifted, turning her palm invitingly towards the blonde’s fingers.</p>
<p>‘<em>So, I thought we could vote for whatever we want to watch?</em>’ Raven said as she came back into the living room with pretzels and a bag of chips, and Lexa and Clarke instantly parted.</p>
<p>‘<em>Yeah that’s a good idea.</em>’ The blonde admitted just as she flashed Lexa a knowing smile.</p>
<p>‘<em>How about some Friends reruns on Netflix?</em>’ Octavia suggested from the kitchen.</p>
<p>‘<em>I was thinking something hotter like Wonder Woman?</em>’ Raven said, winking at Clarke and Lexa.</p>
<p>From the corner of her eyes, Lexa caught Clarke narrowing her eyes at Raven before looking at Lexa and shrugging.</p>
<p>‘<em>What do you think?</em>’ She asked.</p>
<p>‘<em>I’m good with both but I have to admit there’s a soft spot in my heart for Friends.</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>That’s my girl!</em>’ Octavia shouted from the next room. ‘<em>Are you team Ross or Rachel?</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>Rachel, obviously.</em>’ Lexa rolled her eyes to highlight her point. ‘<em>Ross is a huge dinosaur-loving nerd and he’s not my type.</em>’</p>
<p>They all settled in front of the TV when Octavia came back into the living-room with a bowl of popcorn. Clarke sat cross-legged on one end of the couch and Lexa chose a spot next to her, far enough to be comfortable and not clingy but close enough that the blonde’s knees were brushing against her thighs with every movement.</p>
<p>They watched several episodes one after the other, stopping for quick bathroom breaks and heated debates, each of them pitching in with their own comments and unpopular opinions (“They really were on a break though!” or “I think Janice is underrated.”). Lexa felt comfortable and at home among the excitement and animation of Clarke’s roommates. Raven was very opinionated and loud which had been a little intimidating at first, but after a while Lexa got used to it. Octavia was much calmer and the two of them balanced each other out well.</p>
<p>At some point between the third and fourth episodes of their Friends marathon, Lexa noticed Clarke’s hand resting idly on her knee, just like it had that day they had spent together in the park. She didn’t know if the blonde had noticed, but Lexa wasn’t going to let the moment go to waste this time. She boldly reached out, putting her own hand on top of the other woman’s, her own breath hitching. Clarke’s gaze tore away from the TV screen, almost immediately directed at their joined hands on Lexa’s knee, and then up at Lexa’s face.</p>
<p>There was a beat when Clarke looked at Lexa, slightly dumbstruck. The room was dark save for the halo of the TV screen where the episode was playing, and Lexa faintly registered the laughing track erupting in the background. Her attention was on Clarke, though. After what seemed like an eternity, the blonde smiled at her before leaning back into the couch, resting her head closer to Lexa’s than it had been before. Again, like that day in the park, she gave Lexa a peck on the cheek and the brunette exhaled a soft sigh, squeezing Clarke’s hand a little tighter and relaxing the tense muscles in her shoulders.</p>
<p>Lexa looked around but Raven and Octavia seemed too engrossed in the episode to have noticed the interaction between them. She felt warm and comfortable in this little bubble, with Clarke’s head nearly resting on her shoulder and her hair tickling the exposed skin on her arm. No words were said but there was no need. It felt good, easy. Her cheek was tingling where Clarke’s lips had touched it.</p>
<p>Another two episodes later, Clarke seemed to have dozed off. She had sagged a little in her sleep and the weight of her head was now fully resting against Lexa but the brunette didn’t mind a bit. Clarke was snoring lightly and her breath was ghosting against Lexa’s neck, sending shivers through her body. She didn’t wake until she was jostled slightly by Lexa reaching for some popcorn on the coffee table.</p>
<p>‘<em>Mmh?</em>’ She mumbled sleepily, straightening up in the couch.</p>
<p>‘<em>Sorry, I woke you up.</em>’ Lexa whispered. ‘<em>You wanna go to sleep?</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>No, no, ‘m good.</em>’</p>
<p>She yawned, rubbing her eyes, before blinking a few times and standing up.</p>
<p>‘<em>I’ll be right back. Just going to the bathroom.</em>’</p>
<p>Once Clarke was out of earshot, Raven paused the episode that was still playing and scooted over to sit next to Lexa.</p>
<p>‘<em>So, what’s the deal with you and Griffin?</em>’ She asked, grinning like the Cheshire cat.</p>
<p>‘<em>Huh?</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>That was some obvious PDA just there, don’t think I haven’t noticed.</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>Raven, leave the poor girl alone.</em>’ Octavia reprimanded from the other side of the couch. ‘<em>She came here to have a good time, not to get harassed.</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>Relax, I’m just trying to be nice. It’s a bonding thing!</em>’ She winked at Lexa. ‘<em>Wanna know something funny? Clarke didn’t learn how to burp until she was a freshman in high school. I was the one who taught her. So I guess you could say I’m a mentor to her. Like a guiding light, except I’m not that bright.</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>For fuck’s sake Raven!</em>’ Clarke yelled from the bathroom. ‘<em>I can hear you!</em>’</p>
<p>Octavia rolled her eyes behind Raven’s back, catching Lexa’s amused gaze and shaking her head.</p>
<p>‘<em>You have to give yourself more credit, Griffin!</em>’ Raven yelled back, laughing, and then, turning back to Lexa she added: ‘<em>Clarke is very modest - in every sense of the word. One time, we went skinny dipping at a lake after a party back home, all of us were butt naked and she wouldn’t even take off her bra! I mean, the girl is packing, surely you’ve seen-</em>‘</p>
<p>‘<em>Raven, just shut the fuck up!</em>’ Clarke yelled again, bursting out of the bathroom and throwing a tube of toothpaste at the Latina, who dodged it easily and laughed even harder.</p>
<p>Octavia was watching the scene with the face of a disapproving parent but she looked entertained by Raven’s antics. Lexa was struggling not to laugh: while Clarke’s mild annoyance at her best friend was funny to witness, she was also trying to hide the fact that she was definitely thinking about Clarke’s boobs now, and there was no going back from that.</p>
<p>‘<em>Oh come on,</em>’ Raven said when Clarke came back to sit beside Lexa. ‘<em>It’s nothing harmful, I’m just stating facts.</em>’</p>
<p>This time, it was Clarke who gave Raven the finger, though she didn’t seem truly upset.</p>
<p>‘<em>See? This is why people never believe you when you tell them you’re completing a PhD.</em>’ The blonde said.</p>
<p>‘<em>Really? You’re doing a PhD?</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>Yeah.</em>’ Raven proudly replied. ‘<em>I want to become an engineer. My ultimate goal is to make prosthetic limbs for people with disabilities but it’s a field that lacks funding. It’s fascinating though, the things you can do with biomechanics. The other day we made an artificial hand, with fingers that could bend and grip and all, that was really cool. Sorry I’m rambling.</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>No, no, I think that’s amazing, really. I don’t need a prosthetic or all that, but I guess I could use a brace instead of that thing.</em>’ She jutted her chin towards the crutch that was lying at her feet.</p>
<p>‘<em>I’m pretty sure I could work something out for you. It would take a couple of tries but if you’re willing to spend some time testing it at the lab, then I’m totally down! I actually need to put together a project for the end of the semester, so this could be a win-win situation.</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>Hey, that’s great!</em>’ Clarke said, grinning and nudging Lexa’s arm with her elbow. ‘<em>I mean, as long as Rae doesn’t take advantage of that time to spill all my dirty secrets.</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>You got it!</em>’ Raven winked at the blonde. Lexa decided she liked Raven.</p>
<p>The four of them continued talking until late. Octavia and Raven asked her about her field of study and her plans for the future, and they were even impressed when Lexa mentioned her short career in the military. Clarke listened intently, chiming in often to add little details that the brunette had left out (“You should see her fight! She’s a real badass!”), making Lexa’s ears burn under the praise.</p>
<p>The blonde had curled back into the couch next to her and as the night progressed, Lexa felt more and more at ease with the proximity. Clarke nuzzled into her side at some point, smelling of coconut and perfume. When she fell silent, save for some rare sleepy interventions, Lexa patted her lap and motioned for her to rest her head on her knees. When Clarke hesitantly lowered herself down onto Lexa’s good leg, the brunette gave her shoulder an affectionate squeeze.</p>
<p>It was almost scary how domestic it was quickly becoming: Clarke’s cheek resting on top of Lexa’s thigh and Lexa running her hand through Clarke’s hair, lightly at first and then fully scratching when the blonde started humming softly in appreciation. It was almost like petting a cat, except the cat was a pretty blonde whose breath ghosted against Lexa’s inner thigh every now and again, resulting in a series of shivers running up her spine. She was barely paying attention to the conversation anymore; she was too focused on rubbing her fingertips in circles against Clarke’s scalp, desperate to hear the soft sighs that tumbled out of the blonde’s parted lips.</p>
<p>When Raven and Octavia called it a night, it was almost two in the morning. They said goodnight to Lexa before heading off to their respective rooms. The brunette was left with a sleeping Clarke on her lap. She was snoring softly, looking so peaceful that it almost pained Lexa to wake her up.</p>
<p>‘<em>Clarke, hey.</em>’</p>
<p>The blonde barely stirred, so Lexa gently nudged her shoulder.</p>
<p>‘<em>Hmm?</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>It’s late, I have to go home and you should go sleep in your bed.</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>What?</em>’ Clarke groaned sleepily.</p>
<p>‘<em>Raven and Octavia just went to sleep and you should too. I’ll see you this weekend?</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>Don’t be silly, I’m not letting you go home alone at this time of the night. You can crash in my room.</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>Are you trying to get into my pants?</em>’ Lexa said playfully, quirking an eyebrow.</p>
<p>‘<em>I’ll sleep on the couch, it’s fine.</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>I’ll take the couch. I’m not stealing your bed. Come on, let me take you to your room.</em>’</p>
<p>Clarke sat up and Lexa felt pins and needles invade her legs when the blood rushed back up.</p>
<p>‘<em>I insist, you’ll be more comfortable in a bed with these long legs of yours. I’m good here.</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>You sure? I don’t want to impose…</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>Yep, very sure.</em>’ Clarke said, nodding categorically.</p>
<p>‘<em>I just, uh- I didn’t bring any pajamas.</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>You can borrow some of my stuff. You’re smaller so I’m pretty sure anything will fit you.</em>’</p>
<p>The blonde led Lexa into her room which was the last one at the end of a corridor, next to Raven’s and Octavia’s. It was a really nice bedroom, all blues and oranges. Clarke had decorated it with some white fairy lights which hung from the wall above her bed. There were a bunch of pictures, and upon closer inspection, Lexa recognized Raven and Octavia on some of them. What caught the brunette’s attention the most, though, was the large bisexual pride flag that was pinned to Clarke’s door. If she had any lingering doubts about the blonde’s sexual orientation before, now she definitely knew for certain.</p>
<p>There was a desk in the corner of the room, with a pile of medical books stacked upon it, a laptop and notes. Next to the desk was an easel and some art supplies, and on the floor was a guitar case. Lexa made a mental note to herself to ask Clarke to show her some of her guitar skills the next day.</p>
<p>Clarke rummaged through her drawers for a moment before tossing a pair of sleep shorts and a long shirt on the bed for Lexa.</p>
<p>‘<em>You can wear these. The bathroom is across the hall. There should be a spare toothbrush in the second drawer if you want.</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>Thank you,</em>’ Lexa said before sitting on the bed.</p>
<p>Clarke leaned against the doorframe for a moment before going back in.</p>
<p>‘<em>Can I ask you a question?</em>’ She said, looking hesitant and unsure. She went to sit on the bed next to Lexa, keeping a comfortable amount of space between them.</p>
<p>‘<em>Yeah, sure.</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>I hope you don’t mind me asking. Your leg, what happened exactly?</em>’</p>
<p>Lexa had not been expecting that question. Disability was usually a subject people shied away from. Very few people, apart from the friends she had known before the accident, had ever dared to ask her about it. It was taboo, uncomfortable, and they were scared to trigger something in her, like she was going to break if they so much as mentioned it. But Clarke’s question wasn’t out of pity or indiscrete prying. The genuine blue eyes that bore into hers told Lexa that she really cared.</p>
<p>‘<em>I don’t mind.</em>’ Lexa replied, smiling softly to assure her it was okay. ‘<em>It happened during a drill weekend. I was almost 25, freshly promoted to sergeant. We had ground training and there was a mishap with a grenade. One of mine exploded much closer than it was supposed to and there was serious damage to my leg. I had to have a minor surgery to retrieve some bits and rocks that had lodged inside and could have caused an infection. And then I had a bigger surgery to replace some of the ligaments in my knee and some damaged tissue. So, the whole thing kinda looks like a bunch of mismatched puzzle pieces now. There was some burning and minor scratching as well. I couldn’t walk properly for several months after that.</em>’</p>
<p>Clarke had listened intently throughout, and Lexa was waiting for the moment when she would see a flash of what she called the sad puppy look in the blonde’s eyes – she knew that look all too well from how other people had reacted to the same story. But Clarke was simply nodding in understanding. Her hand came to rest on Lexa’s knee and the brunette was grateful for the attention.</p>
<p>‘<em>Does it hurt?</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>At first it hurt every day. Now it’s only once in a while. I take meds for the pain, so usually I’m okay with walking and doing regular stuff. This crutch helps a lot but it’s not really practical, except for beating pervert assholes.</em>’ She flashed Clarke a cheeky smile at that and the blonde chuckled lightly.</p>
<p>‘<em>I hope Rae will be able to put something together for you. Just think about how much cooler you’d look with a freaking bionic brace!</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>Yeah, that would be great.’</em> Lexa nodded with a smile.</p>
<p>There was a moment of awkwardness again, like the first couple of times they had met, until eventually they were interrupted by Clarke’s yawn.</p>
<p>‘<em>Well, that’s my cue. I guess I should go to sleep. Do you need anything else?</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>I’m good, thanks a lot.</em>’</p>
<p>This time it was Lexa who kissed Clarke’s cheek before they parted.</p>
<p>‘<em>Good night, Clarke</em>’</p>
<p>‘<em>’Night, Lexa.</em>’ The blonde grinned in response, a blush settling high on her cheeks.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>(I apologize to anyone working in the military or in the medical field: I did some light research but there are probably some inaccuracies... oopsie.)</p>
<p>(Also: the burping anecdote may or may not have been inspired by a friend of mine.)</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0007"><h2>7. Chapter 7</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Clarke POV: Pancakes, goldfish, and a step in the right direction.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I couldn't wait to get to this chapter so I wrote it during the night, finals be damned. I'm exhausted this morning but I think it was worth it. I put a lot of myself in it. Please let me know if you liked it, kudos and comments are very much appreciated! x</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <hr/><p>                The next morning, Clarke was woken up by the bright sunlight seeping through the living room curtains. She groaned in protest and rubbed her eyes from sleep. For a split second, she wondered why she was on the couch and not in her bed until she remembered Lexa had stayed the night in her room. Smiling to herself, she pictured the brunette curled up against her pillow and bundled up under her bedcovers. She stretched and reached out for her phone on the coffee table to check her messages.</p><p>‘<em>Oh, hi, you’re awake.</em>’</p><p>Clarke craned her neck in search of the voice and sat up, burrowing herself into the plaid blanket to stay warm. Lexa appeared in front of her with two steaming mugs, and the delicious smell of lazy mornings invaded Clarke’s nostrils.</p><p>‘<em>I made us coffee. Uh- I hope that’s okay.</em>’ She said, smiling softly before sitting at the end of the couch.</p><p>Her hair was tied up in a messy bun with a few stray brown curls bouncing in front of her eyes. Clarke’s fingers were itching to sweep them to the side. Lexa was still wearing the pajamas borrowed from her the night before and the blonde swallowed thickly, noticing the way the flannel sleep shorts were riding up just slightly and exposing soft, tan skin. She could also make out the barest hint of hard nipples against the fabric of the shirt Lexa was wearing, and Clarke almost inadvertently knocked the coffee mug off the brunette’s hand when she handed it to her.</p><p>‘<em>Oh, sorry-</em> <em>That’s perfect, thank you. You didn’t have to.</em>’ She managed to say after finally looking away from the subtle curves filling her own clothes. ‘<em>Did you sleep well?</em>’</p><p>‘<em>Yeah, you?</em>’</p><p>‘<em>Yeah.</em>’</p><p>Lexa nodded and took a sip from her coffee, plump lips wrapping around white ceramic. Clarke took a sip of her own while her sleep-muddled brain went off on a tangent imagining the many other things these lips might be capable of. She shook the inappropriate thought out of her head.</p><p>‘<em>Do you have any plans for today?</em>’ The brunette questioned after a while, her mercury eyes –the artist in Clarke was still trying to identify their exact color- turning to Clarke with a somewhat hopeful look.</p><p>‘<em>Not for now. I’m free for the day and Raven, Octavia and I made plans to go to the club tonight with a group of friends. You could come with us if you want.</em>’</p><p>‘<em>That sounds nice. I’m sorry, I would’ve joined you guys but I’m supposed to be at Anya’s tonight. She’s dating this new guy and wants to introduce us.’ </em>She looked genuinely downhearted. ‘<em>Next time I’ll come, for sure.</em></p><p>‘<em>I bet you’ll be coming.</em>’ Clarke winked, pleased with her double entendre which earned her a challenging eyebrow quirk from Lexa. ‘<em>Too bad for tonight, though.</em>’</p><p>‘<em>Yeah, I would have loved to see what a drunk Clarke Griffin looks like.</em>’ The brunette teased.</p><p>‘<em>Well, she’s a lousy dancer but will beat you at beer pong.</em>’</p><p>‘<em>That would be underestimating my skills. I can be very dexterous.</em>’ Lexa gave a toothy grin and Clarke felt her insides melt in more ways than one at the playful twinkle in her eyes.</p><p>‘<em>So…</em>’ Clarke said after a minute of silence, ‘<em>did you have fun last night?</em>’</p><p>‘<em>Yeah, that was really nice. Raven is pretty cool, and now I can see how she ended up in a garbage truck after a night out. She sounds fun at parties.</em>’</p><p>Clarke chuckled, nodding in agreement before downing the rest of her coffee and pushing the plaid blanket off of her. She had forgotten for a second that she was only wearing her tank top and panties, but she didn’t regret it one bit when she saw the way Lexa’s eyes zeroed in on her bare legs and trailed up her body. Her gaze lingered on Clarke’s chest before quickly snapping up to her face, blushing when she noticed the blonde looking back at her. Clarke smirked knowingly.</p><p>‘<em>If you want you can go take a shower while I whip up some pancakes.</em>’ She told Lexa. ‘<em>Rae is at the gym, she won’t be back until noon, and Octavia is at Lincoln’s.</em>’</p><p>‘<em>Thank you.</em>’</p><p>Raven always went to the gym on Saturday mornings so this wasn’t surprising, but Octavia didn’t usually go to Lincoln’s this early. Clarke had received a text from her informing her that she would be at her boyfriend’s all day, and she suspected it was all a strategy to get her some time alone with Lexa. Lincoln was probably in the loop as well. Clarke briefly thought about the fact that Lexa and him were best friends, and that maybe he knew things that she didn’t. She shrugged off the hopeful question mark in her mind and reminded herself to investigate on the matter the next time she would see Lincoln, although she doubted he would ever betray Lexa if she had indeed confided in him.</p><p>While the cogs were turning in Clarke’s head, Lexa had picked up both their coffee mugs to put them away in the kitchen sink. Clarke stood from the couch and crossed the room, motioning for the brunette to follow her. She may have swayed her hips a little more than necessary knowing that the other woman was right behind her and probably staring. <em>Definitely</em> staring.</p><p>She took out a clean bath towel and picked a decent pair of underwear from her own drawers for Lexa.</p><p>‘<em>There you go; you call me if you need anything.</em>’ She said before closing the bathroom door behind her and leaving the brunette to it.</p><p>She went back into the kitchen, put some music on and started cooking, humming along to the song. The sound of the shower running on the other side of the wall was doing things to Clarke’s brain and she mentally scolded herself for having the composure of a hormonal fourteen year-old boy. She had to force herself not to imagine the brunette naked under the stream of water, her hands sliding along soft, wet skin, lathering herself up… Clarke only hummed louder to cover the sultry voice-over that accompanied the scene in her head and focused on not burning the pancakes.</p><p>When Lexa came out of the bathroom, Clarke had set up their plates on the small table in the kitchen.</p><p>‘<em>Aw it smells so good, thank you!</em>’ The brunette said, practically squealing when she saw the small trickle of maple syrup that covered the pancakes.</p><p>Clarke devoured her breakfast so quickly she would have been ashamed of it weren’t Lexa doing the same.</p><p>‘<em>Want another one?</em>’ She asked once they had emptied their plates.</p><p>‘<em>Do you have more?</em>’</p><p>‘<em>Yeah I made a bunch of them.</em>’</p><p>‘<em>Oh god, yes.</em>’</p><p>‘<em>I didn’t think I’d ever find someone with the same appetite for pancakes as me.</em>’ Clarke laughed as she served them both another round of breakfast.</p><p>‘<em>Really?</em>’ Lexa said, quirking an eyebrow in disbelief. ‘<em>Who have you been hanging out with?</em>’</p><p>‘<em>People who don’t deserve my cooking skills, clearly.</em>’</p><p>They both wolfed down another two pancakes each, talking with their mouths full and almost choking on more than one occasion when the other made a funny joke. The whole scene was absolutely ungraceful and incredibly domestic, Clarke noticed. Lexa’s hair, still damp from the shower, framed her face with dark curls, and the light freckles on her cheeks and on the bridge of her nose were even more visible now. Her eyes had changed color again -or was it the lighting? They were aqua green, the color of the sea right on the shore, where the water was shallow and it was safe, welcoming. Clarke wanted to dive right in.</p><p>‘<em>Is that Fleetwood Mac?</em>’ Lexa questioned after a while and Clarke snapped out of her trance.</p><p>Fleetwood Mac’s ‘The Chain’ was playing in the background from the playlist on Clarke’s phone.</p><p>‘<em>Yeah, you like it?</em>’</p><p>‘<em>It’s one of my dad’s favorite bands. I named my goldfish Rhiannon from their song.</em>’ The brunette said with a lopsided smile, toying with the remnants of her pancake with her fork.</p><p>‘<em>Good choice! And where’s Rhiannon right now?</em>’</p><p>‘<em>She died when I was 8. My dad had to flush her down the toilet and that was my first experience with childhood trauma.</em>’ She said matter-of-factly. Her tone was playful though.</p><p>‘<em>Oh wow, that’s pretty harsh.</em>’</p><p>‘<em>Yeah, I wore only black for a month after that. That’s how much of a drama queen I was.</em>’ Lexa laughed, and Clarke could definitely picture the young brunette at school, looking solemn and grave in her mourning attire.</p><p>They finished eating and put the plates away, doing the dishes together like it was a well-established routine. Hands were brushing against one another every now and then and each time felt more electric than the last, as though there had been a magnetic field between them, so dense that it was almost palpable.</p><p>Afterwards, Lexa wordlessly led Clarke by the hand into the bedroom.</p><p>‘<em>I saw you had a guitar. Do you play?</em>’ She asked mischievously, and her smile widened when the blonde nodded. ‘<em>Would you play something for me?</em>’</p><p>She picked up the guitar and handed it to Clarke who took it and sat on the bed.</p><p>‘<em>Um, yeah, sure. It’s been a while though so I might be a bit rusty.</em>’</p><p>Lexa settled next to her with her legs crossed, waiting patiently as the blonde tuned the instrument and played a few bars. Clarke didn’t play much anymore, she barely had the time to do so, but she settled on one of the few songs she remembered and started strumming. It was a folk ballad and if Clarke were honest with herself, she had picked it on purpose.</p><p>The lyrics went “And I’m sending you out this signal here, I hope you can pick it up loud and clear / Oh honey, you turn me on I’m a radio / If your head says ‘forget it’ but your heart’s still smoking, call me at the station, the lines are open.” She delivered them with practiced ease, muscle memory working its charm even though her voice was still rough from sleep. Clarke could feel her face burning under Lexa’s intent stare throughout the song.</p><p>The brunette seemed oblivious to the occasional blunders, or just chose not to dwell on them. Either way, she looked completely entranced and by the end of the song, when the last chord rang and faded into the air, she was beaming. After such a moment, the silence was deafening and Clarke’s breathing caught in her throat in anticipation.</p><p>‘<em>Clarke?</em>’</p><p>‘<em>Mmh?</em>’</p><p>‘<em>Can- can I kiss you?</em>’</p><p>The timid question cut through the quiet like hot steel and Clarke felt it echo in her ears like tinnitus. She vaguely registered herself nodding before Lexa’s sweetness was all over and around her. Lexa’s hand wrapped around her neck ever so gently and brought her closer, as though she were picking up fine china, before closing the remaining distance between them.</p><p>It was awkward, the guitar was in the way and the metal buttons of Lexa’s shirt caught against the strings when she leaned forward, but the dissonant buzzing that resulted didn’t reach Clarke’s ears. Soft, pillowy lips came into contact with Clarke’s own and the blonde felt her skin tingle where they met. After the initial shock, she relaxed into the kiss, pushing back against Lexa’s lips with equal conviction and gentleness until they both settled into a delicious ebb and flow. Her hand cradled the brunette’s face, thumb stroking at a high cheekbone, earning a sigh.</p><p>It was soft and sweet. Lexa’s lips tasted like maple syrup and toothpaste, and she smelled like Clarke’s shampoo –coconut and vanilla. Her damp hair tickled the sides of Clarke’s face, and the blonde practically purred when she felt Lexa’s other hand wrap around her waist. <em>Oh yeah, she picked up the signal alright.</em></p><p>They moved slowly against one another, all soft and pliant lips and warm breaths. Lexa pulled away after a while, too soon to Clarke’s liking.</p><p>‘<em>Thank you, that was perfect.</em>’ She said, and the blonde didn’t know if she was talking about the kiss or the song.</p><p>Clarke didn’t reply, and frankly no words were needed. Lexa’s smile was telling enough that she didn’t need reassurance about the kiss. Clarke grinned and licked her lips, chasing the taste of her.</p><p>‘<em>Um so-</em>‘</p><p>‘<em>Yeah, that was-</em>‘</p><p>‘<em>Actually, I’m going to go shower.</em>’ The blonde said out of the blue, standing abruptly from the bed and putting the guitar away.</p><p>She immediately regretted the bluntness of her words when she saw the way Lexa’s face crumbled into a look of concern.</p><p>‘<em>Oh okay. I’m sorry… do you want me to leave?</em>’ Her voice was tinted with a twinge of pain.</p><p>‘<em>No! No, absolutely not. Please, stay.</em>’</p><p>‘<em>Are we okay, Clarke? Did I do something wrong?</em>’</p><p>‘<em>Oh I’m very okay.</em>’ She smiled reassuringly to ease the confusion in Lexa’s eyes. ‘<em>You didn’t do anything wrong, I just need to gather my thoughts for a moment. It’s all good, you’re good.</em>’</p><p>‘<em>Okay.</em>’ The brunette said sheepishly.</p><p>‘<em>Don’t leave, please.</em>’</p><p>Clarke covered Lexa’s hand with hers and squeezed like she meant it. She just needed a few minutes to herself to think about what just happened and what she wanted to say to the brunette, not to mention the fact that she was still in her panties and pajama top.</p><p>Under the shower stream, Clarke’s mind replayed the kiss over and over. It was all lips and no tongue, all softness and no force, definitely nothing like the last meaningless kisses she had shared with her occasional one-night stands on the weekends. It was nothing like the hurried mashing lips and sloppy drunken kisses she’d had, stumbling on the doorstep of her late night conquest’s apartment and praying to god she had a condom in her purse.</p><p>No, this was the purest kiss she had experienced in a very long time, and Clarke decided it wasn’t driven by lust. Lexa’s lips had been all too soft and gentle for that. The brunette had put her hands on Clarke’s body so reverently and with such care that Clarke had felt compelled to touch Lexa with the same affection, pushing and pulling against her and answering every movement with her own. There was definitely something to be said about how easily they had both found their footing, even as their lips were anchored against each other’s for the first time.</p><p>Not wanting to keep Lexa in the dark any longer, Clarke turned off the shower and dried herself off before getting dressed. She made her way back to her bedroom where the brunette was –thankfully- still there, sitting on the bed with one of Clarke’s medical books in her lap.</p><p>‘<em>Hey.</em>’ Lexa greeted with a nonchalant smile.</p><p>She ran her hand through her hair in a failed attempt at looking casual and relaxed, when Clarke could tell the wait was agonizing to her.</p><p>‘<em>Hey,</em>’ Clarke replied, smirking. ‘<em>Your book is upside-down.</em>’</p><p>‘<em>Oh.</em>’</p><p>Clarke laughed softly before crawling back onto the bed and settling beside her. Her hand brushed Lexa’s cheek, sweeping off the blush that had crept up into the brunette’s face.</p><p>‘<em>Can I kiss you?</em>’ Clarke asked, and when Lexa nodded, she leaned in to close the distance between them.</p><p>Without the guitar in Clarke’s lap, she could feel the warmth of Lexa’s body against her chest. Yeah, that was something else.</p><p>‘<em>I’m sorry for making you wait.</em>’ She said after she pulled away. ‘<em>I just… I like you. Like, really like you.</em>’</p><p>Lexa’s eyes widened at that, and the tense crinkle in her brow visibly relaxed.</p><p>‘<em>I like you too, Clarke.</em>’</p><p>‘<em>I know we only met a few weeks ago but I like you. I like spending time with you, I like just being with you, and I want to be more than just friends. It’s too early to tell just how much, but I want to keep this thing going. The pancakes, the kiss and all.</em>’</p><p>The word “love” was hanging in the air between them, like a hypothesis. Like the hint of a possibility that neither of them was to confident to bring up in that moment, but it was there somewhere, if they would just give a little time to let it bloom.</p><p>‘<em>I feel the same. I want to do more of this.</em>’ She gestured around them vaguely. ‘<em>I want us to be together, any way you want. We don’t have to put a label on it right now. I just want you, any way you’ll have me. And hopefully that includes more pancakes and kisses.</em>’</p><p>She smiled fondly and Clarke felt it pull at her heart. She tucked a strand of brown hair behind Lexa’s ear and loved the way she sagged into her touch.</p><p>‘<em>Definitely more pancakes and kisses.</em>’</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>The song Clarke plays on the guitar is "You turn me on, I'm a radio" by Joni Mitchell :)</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
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